The Guy With The Disappearing Acts…

Ladies. Do yourself a favour and stay away from guys who aren’t sure how they feel about you.  MaKupsy Feb 2015

There is never a dull moment in my life.  You already know this if you follow my blog.  Many moons ago there was a guy who my friend decided to “hook me up with”.  I am not a fan of “hook ups” but since my friend spoke so highly of him I was like why not get to meet him and see what he is all about.  We got to meet after chatting for a while over WhatsApp.  It was a brief meeting which probably lasted a minute, we were in the same area at the time so we just said hello.  I didn’t hear from him for a while after that.  I really wasn’t concerned but my friend on the other hand, she was all up with questions.

At some point we got back in touch again.  I think it was actually after months.  The good thing is we had flawless conversation so we just picked up where we left of.  That time we probably kept in touch for a month, or was it two, to be honest I really wasn’t counting but after some time he disappeared again.

That’s when I told my friend that her hook up was a joke.  Who blows hot and cold without specific reason(s)?  Like you are just left there to wonder what’s going on?  I told her that her “dating service” had really gone wrong and I actually didn’t want to talk to this guy anymore.  My friend was his biggest cheerleader and she kept giving me imaginary excuses as to why he wasn’t keeping constant communication with me.  The only good thing about this whole thing was that I actually hadn’t grown any real feelings for him so whether he appeared or disappeared did not make much of a difference to me.

Then he came back YET AGAIN, gosh the way that just drains your freaking energy.  This time he had flowery words and “acts of kindness” to go with it.  The guy was taking me to work, picking me up, spending time with me, doing errands together, going out and even having conversations over the phone till I fell asleep with my phone in my hands.  Then like clockwork he disappeared into thin air.

Let’s get to the juicy bit of this story.  This guy then came back again with a story about:

  1. How he wasn’t ready to be in a relationship
  2. How he was scared to be in a committed relationship
  3. How he had never had a relationship with a Twimbo (Zimbabwean on Twitter)
  4. How I was a great person but he just couldn’t be in a relationship with me
  5. How he had fallen in love with me



Biggest joke ever!  Who has so many conflicting statements in one go?  I just sat there and listened and just said to myself I am too old for this shit!  To make things even more annoying was the fact that I actually didn’t have a romantic connection with this guy and here he was selling me a bullshit story.  What we had was a good friendship and nothing more.  He clearly had a whole lot of issues to deal with and I was not sticking around to witness them because I need me some peace of mind.

I know you are reading this and asking yourself why I kept entertaining him after he got back from wherever he would have disappeared to but you know how some women just love attention, yes, I was in it for the attention I got. 

Don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t a bad person but I just think he was hoping at some point he would get laid and so each time he came with a different story to try and convince me that he was into me.  Yes, I said it!  I believe that a guy always knows what he wants from the get go and he will make his intentions clear.  If he is acting all kinds of shady then he clearly has a motive which probably won’t end well.

To the ladies I say to you; if you ever find yourself in this situation run away as fast as you can.  That guy will leave you confused for days and you don’t need that kind of individual in your life.  Be with a guy who knows what he wants, period!

In Alfie’s famous words: “You don’t get to reserve people for later because you are not ready; that’s not how this love thing works hatisi mufushwa!” (we are not dried vegetables!!)





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