Roora (Lobola/Dowry)
A man marrying a woman from the Shona culture has to observe the roora. This is a sign or show of love and affection when a man saves up and marries his beloved. There are many ways this can be done but I will dwell on the general procedures followed on the following condition The man has done all the other necessities e.g. proposing (not musengabere, kutizisa), formal Introductions (dated for over 6 months) and more importantly girl is not pregnant (damage) or previously been married (virgin?). In Zimbabwe, roora takes place in a number of stages and each stage has its own traditions and small amounts to pay. The process can differ from place to place due to the fact that in the Shona culture there are 12 different ethnic groups.
Stage One – Introduction
This stage involves the ‘munyayi’ who is a go-between when a man goes to pay the bride price at his future wife’s family stating to the family his intentions and purpose of visit e.g. “I have been sent by (the husband) to look for Sadza” , literally translated to I have come to marry your daughter (name). Here they are asked who they mean. Once this is done the bride’s family will ask the daughter if she knows the people who have come to marry her.
Stage two – Grocery
A list is given to the groom prior the ceremony, this will be a list of groceries required to bring to the family. The items are then checked and should match that on the original list for example, if its 5kg of sugar he should bring exactly that and not less. Adhering to the stated requirements of the new in-laws is a show of respect from the new son-in-law. It is often advisable to do exactly as stated or better, to ensure smooth relations between the newly united families. Some families are more tolerant than others; A LOT of tolerance is needed as this is not a money making ceremony.
Stage Three – Preparations for payment
At this stage the bride’s family will ask for ‘ndiro’ normally a wooden plate from the munyayi and if he has brought one he would present it. This (the plate); in the past used to be provided by the bride’s family but since some people began charging for them some go with their own wooden plates. Once the plate has been placed a process known as ‘sunungura homwe’ (loosening pockets) or ‘Vhuramuromomo’ (meaning opening of mouth) where a small fee is paid to for the greeting of the guests. At this stage some fines may be imposed. For instance if the groom failed to meet an earlier date even if he notified the bride’s family well in advance and any other misdemeanours he might have done, These however should done with humour and laughter just to make the ‘munyayi’ feel at home and comfortable.
Stage Four–Payments
The process of Roora negotiations can be long and complex, and involves many members from both the bride’s and the groom’s extended families so these days due to our busy nature in some parts it being shortened and made less complex. The payment stage has quite a many stages which can even take days to complete. These are now grouped in two main sub processes which are:-
1. Zvireverere zvaBaba (Gifts for the father)
This stage involves payment that are direct from the bride’s father (a guardian or representative can accept charge for these if the paternal father is deceased or not known) which in the old days had a lot of very long sub-processes and has been shortened. The main payment is the ‘Matekenyandebvu’ to acknowledge him for “the pulling of the beard” as she sat on his knee, or putting up with the playful antics of his daughter as a child. The amount paid for the father is negotiable.
2. Zvireverere zvaMai (Gifts for the mother)
Same as the process above the payment are strictly for the bride’s mother (a guardian or representative can accept charge for these if the maternal father is deceased or not known).
The gifts for the mother of the bride in the old days included things like ‘mbereko’, for carrying the bride in a pouch or sling when she was a baby, and ‘mafukidzadumbu’ for covering of the belly; this is alternately translated as “carrying the baby in the womb” or “tucking the baby in with a blanket (when she wakes in the night)”. These are now charged under this blanket term due to the complexity of the past processes as well as the fact that people may have even forgotten exactly the names of the processes. The amount paid for the mother is non-negotiable.
Stage Five – Mbudzi yedare (yemachinda) Goat
This is a live goat that is brought by the man and is slaughtered during the payment process. The whole goat is then cooked and made ready to be served after the completion of the ceremony. If they don’t bring a goat a payment will be asked for and this money is shared equally between all the boys available at the household (usually can cause a lot of commotion if the amount is not even).
Stage Six – Musikana/Tete (Gifts for the bride)
The woman being married is required to pick some money from the plate for herserlf. This money in some places can be set by the aunt or the woman’s sister. This is a small allowance for ’Mari inonhongwa nemusihare’ for the purchase of household or cooking utensils, and this amount is given to the bride. If there are younger sisters or siblings, she may give them a portion of the money. This money is for all the cooking that would have taken place for the party which the groom will finance after the ceremony is concluded. Usually this money can be returned by the woman to her future husband to cover the other payment that would follow.
Stage Seven – Rusambo (Roora, Dowry)
This is the most important stage called “Rusambo” and although the above process is referred to or called “roora”, this is the name given to the whole ceremony and all of the gifts, not just the bride price or dowry. Paying Roora is called ‘kubvisa pfuma’, giving (or parting with) wealth. Roora is wealth and its quantum must be consistent with wealth. This stage can only be reached if the stages mentioned above have been fulfilled. The bride price varies and nowadays factors in things like the social class of both the groom and the bride. This however can be paid as a part payment as long as some form of payment is made. For illustration purposes maybe the above processes may have cost the groom $1400 and he had only brought $2000 it is accepted for him to pay $600.00 and then the rest will follow for the next twenty years. If the groom fails to come up with any part payment then the whole process becomes null and void and will have to be started again at a later date and he will not be give his bride.
Stage eight – Danga (Livestock)
This stage traditionally is a gift of cattle and nowadays it is most commonly paid in cash, although the amounts will still be representative of fair market price for cattle. Normally the number is between seven to eight cows and in those the most important one is the one for the mother known as ‘mombe yeumai.’ This should always be a live cow that the groom gives to the mother in law. The cow is expected to produce an offspring as proof that the union has been blessed, also our belief the most powerful ancestors that protect us are the maternal ones. ’Mudzimu wamai ukadambura mbereko’ (if maternal spirits let go) spells disaster. To keep these spirits happy and attentive there is need to follow the ‘mombe yeumai’ protocol to the letter. To to give ‘mombe yeumai’ is to acknowledge this spiritual symbolism. Once the offspring is weaned it is then expected that the cow can be slaughtered by the bride’s family and eaten by both families just as thanks giving and strengthening both the couple’s relationship as well as the family as a whole. This will take place after two to five years. This stage is dependent on the Rusambo stage and if Rusambo is not available then they cannot proceed to this current stage. In old times ‘pfuma/roora’ consisted of cattle, ’mapadza’ (symbolic iron hoes) and ‘machira’ (imported cloth) as indicative of a rich agricultural community.
Stage Nine – Majasi (Clothes)
This stage also dependent on the Rusambo stage. It is the gift of clothes that the groom is expected to buy for his in-laws. As stated after Rusambo has been paid and the bride’s family are happy the groom and his party will then be invited and welcomed into the family ‘Kupinzwa mumusha’, the groom will then greet the in-laws as a new groom (no longer a prospective groom or stranger, but a member of the family) with the special traditional clapping greeting ‘Gusvi’ and is permitted to be a part of the household. At this stage he will be given a list of items of clothing that both the mother and father require normally full attire from top to bottom.
N.B Lobola Groceries vary from family to family but the standard grocery list is:
Cartons or boxes of:
Rice
Hupfu
Meat
Cooking oil
Tissues
Soap
Drinks
Flour
This article was written by Richard Chashamba Thank you very much for the information you shared with me, I hope someone will have a clear view of what the Shona Lobola Procedures comprise of and not be in the dark like I was. This was very a very insightful article.
© MaKupsy
thank you so much with this article im a young man soon to merry
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I’m glad the article has helped. All the best on your big day Clive.
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Really insightful article…really cleared up a lot of confusion as regards the tradition. Trust me as non-Zimbabwean planning to marry a Zim girl, this is the most articulate article I have read on this lobola thing. Thanks
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You just made my morning! I’m happy to know that my blog is helping not only Zimbabweans but everyone around the globe. All the best on your big day and thank you for stopping by 🙂
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Ok thank you on the info but i wanted to ask how a man can obtain a price list from the bride’s familly
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You are God sent!
My English fiance had a lot of questions about this process as he is preparing to go through the Roora process…..and I had no idea what to say to him. I knew nothing of the proceedings and I am so grateful to have found this information.
Thank you so much!
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Ohhh you should see the smile on my face Jane. I’m glad the article was put to good use, now you have your work cut out for you.
All the best on your big day. 🙂
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Thanks so much for being e ducative on marriage procedures. I have a question to ask here.
who takes this rusambo is it the mother or the father of the bride.
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Thank you for stopping by Mike. The father takes rusambo.
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wow, thanks a million…I am gonna be acting as the father of the bride, you’ve no idea how clueless I was. thank god for people like you.
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You just made my morning. I’m glad you found this article informative. All the best on the big day and here’s hoping everything runs smoothly.
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Gees, bless your soul! This article was very informative indeed. My only wish is if you could put up an example of how much is expected for each of stages above. What is considered “average” so we have a good idea how much money to carry with us.
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Thank you for stopping by. It warms my heart when readers tell me they found the article useful.
I’m sure the amounts differ with each family but I will make an effort to find out the prices and add them on, thank you for the marvelous suggestion 🙂
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Is the process the same for both a virgin and someone who has been married before?
Is it possible for you to take us through the process of someone who is getting married for the second time?
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What is the place for ‘roora’, against a background of the abuse of women, domestic violence and poverty. Does it create bitterness in men over women, whom they in some cases treat like assets. Despite it being a black people’s culture, what are the positive outcomes of roora to the black people’s lives in full view of the economic challenges and social equality. Who does benefit from roora (women, parents, society or God) and does not benefit from roora. Thank you for this nice article.
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Thank you for stopping by Michael. You pose some very important questions. After all is said and done who really benefits from this practice? Definitely not the new couple if you ask me. I wrote a post just the other day on yet another issue on lobola. I hope you will check it out.
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What is the place for ‘roora’ in our lives, against a background of women abuses, domestic violence and increasing poverty. Do you think ‘roora’ may contribute to bitterness in men, over women, whom they sometimes treat like assets. Despite it being a black community’s culture, what benefit has it gave us in our lives, in full view of economic challenges, poverty, increased divorce rates and social inequalities. Who is benefiting from ‘roora’, is it women, men, parents, society or our God. Still, who is not benefiting from ‘roora’. Makupsy, thank you for this nice article, I am a motivational writer, I like your effort.
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Thank you for such a great article. Do you have a write up of procedures when a man doesn’t want to marry the woman but wants the child or accepting responsibility of pregnancy (in a case where the girl has been impregnated or has already given birth-expansion of STAGE 3 above)
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Thank you for reading. Unfortunately I don’t have anything on the subject of “Damages”. Perhaps you can get in touch with the author, his details are at the end of the article, I’m sure he will be a great help.
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This fiery topic has been raging on twitter recently. I have no comment but to say culture is dynamic accept what it gives or get buried with a rat on your back.
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This is one topic that never gets old. I remember people blocking and unfollowing each other when I first joined Twitter. I believe it’s a free world, do whatever floats your boat otherwise will be miserable.
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Thank for the article. You are my savior. I was invited to handle marriage for my late brother’s daughter but didn’t know how. Luck enough I came across this article afew days before and it made my day.
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I’m glad this was helpful Mondiwa. All the best on the big day 🌼
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I really got educated and got the knowledge. My issue is that my mother wants cash not mombe yeumai of which how can we solve this issue. This issue of mombe was clear and straight forward
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I’m happy the blog post was informative for you Tatenda. On the issue of mombe yeumai. I’m told that giving money as an option is not ideal as “pane chivanhu chinofanirwa kutaurirwa mombe iyoyo.” Many people have had problems for not abiding by the tradition and choosing money over the cow. If anything perhaps once she gets the cow she can sell it and do whatever she wishes with it in this case sell it and get the cash.
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Hope you had a good day. I wish to know if there would be any different in the procedure or payment if the bride has a child out of wedlock. Good night.
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Hello Mondiwa. The procedure remains the same, however if you’re marrying into a family inonzwisisa they will charge you less. Example, where they would ordinarily want 4 cows they will charge 2 cows…
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Brilliant article. very informative.
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I’m glad you enjoyed the read and thank you 🙂
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Great article. No doubt that this was prepared by someone who really understands our culture.
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Thank you for passing through. Indeed he is. I’m actually trying to convince him to share his knowledge on other aspects of our culture like paying damage or gupuro procedure…It will be quite insightful to know what really goes on.
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thank you very much …so currently on average Rusambo can be how much …fair price
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Thank you for stopping by. The Rusambo just like the Lobola price depends on each family. All the best to you, I hope they won’t charge you an arm and a leg!
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Thank you very much ..i took my time to read and i found it very helpful .
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Anytime Isaac. It makes me happy when readers benefit from my blog posts 🙂
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Thank you so much for this article, I am a young man representing my father and I had never seen a lobola taking place. Blessings to you, forever and ever.
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Anytime Takura. I hope your big day will go well. Thank you for the warm wishes, I’m always happy when I create content that adds value to my readers 🙂
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Thank you. Question-who qualifies to be a munyai?
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Thank you for reading. I’d have to find out for you but from the top of my head I think your closest friend qualifies as long as he has excellent negotiation skills.
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This has helped gain an understanding of the process. My girlfriend, who is a Zimbabwean, mentioned that she cares about the tradition of just the dowry. I looked into it and it was different than what she was saying. It seemed dowry is used differently by different cultures. Still have many questions, but to find this on the her culture and Shona language helps greatly.
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Hi there Ian! I’m happy to know that the article helped you learn a thing or two about the Shona culture. Which part of Zimbabwe is your girlfriend from?
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Very useful information indeed, well articulated
Iam enlightened
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Quite detailed. This is our culture and in no way can we avoid it. Very insightful.
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Thank you for reading Elias and I’m glad the article was helpful.
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How is roora shared. Does ambuya (grand mother) get anything
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Wow this article is very informative. If things go well this beautiful ceremony will be happening at my parent’s house soon. Reading this made me eager and excited 🙂
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Very informative and helpful but on stage 6 last item..yes the money can be given back to the bridegroom BUT that money must be reibursed to the wife later on
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Hi! Thank for this helpful information! Do you have an article or can you advise on the traditional attire worn for the traditional wedding and lobola?
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Thank you very much this was very helpful.How ever in the event,,,for example my daughter wants to get married but her dad passed away. Could it be wrong if one of her father’s brother is not representing but her brother or cousin brother as a father?
Ever since the father passed away they did not come to check on the children.
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Thank you bro this is so helpful
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Thank you so much iam a young lady soon to be married
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You’re welcome Tino and I hope your lobola day was a day to remember 🙂
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This is so informative, am a young lady and soon to be married.
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I’m glad it was helpful Vimbai. Congratulations on your soon to be union🎉
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Very constructive and the guidance is straight forward. You won’t get lost when you start this of issue. You are greatly thanked
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South Africa’s normally expected $2700 dollars lobola don’t stand a chance here, I see myself pulling out approximately $7000 after the whole roora procedures here. So my wife will be the most expensive at this place🤣 thanks so much this is very informative.
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Hahaha I like this for you, A LOT! She’s a very special woman, $7000 is a lot of money. Thank you for taking time to read and I’m happy the article was helpful. All the best on your new journey.
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