Amazing how some couples choose not to talk about birth control methods. I get that it can be a very uncomfortable topic but you two already talk about everything else except this not-so-sexy subject. A subject that might make or break you if you don’t take any action after reading this post…
If you haven’t had the talk then you’re in luck but if you’re already deep in the strokes it’s not too late for you either. These are some of the reasons why I think you and your partner BOTH need to go a health specialist to decide on the contraception method you will be using.
- You get to know the contraception methods readily available to you and the advantages and disadvantages that come with them.
- You can both make a decision on which method to use. It takes two (or more depending on how adventurous you are) to tango so a decision you both agree on makes your sexual life a whole lot easier.
- Men need to be more involved in sexual health issues. Too many of them simply assume the woman is covered but is she really?
- In the even that the method of contraception you choose to use fails you will both face the consequences so you may as well both know what to or not to expect in advance.
In my opinion this is round about the time you openly discuss how you feel about having child(ren). The “what if the method fails” talk should also fall somewhere there because contraceptive methods are not 100% effective and anything can go wrong. What’s the next step if you do fall pregnant? Do you keep the baby, have an abortion, start a family, get married…lay down all the options before the situation happens so that you know how you will move forward. Then again when things actually happen feelings might change but having a rough idea of how you will approach the situation will certainly help make better informed decisions.
Your health is important. You and your partner should get tested not just for HIV/Aids but for STIs as well. A lot of men in our culture are scared to get tested and get “tested through the woman.” A case where if the woman is pregnant or goes for her routine checks he comforts himself saying that if she’s safe he is also safe. Dear men, it’s unfortunate that it doesn’t work like that, if you are sexually active you both need to go for these tests.
You would think that being on a method of contraception would make your life easier but it comes with pros and cons!
- It’s safe, at least you will have a goodnight’s rest after unprotected sex knowing you are protected from unwanted pregnancy.
- It reduces acne for some women.
- It helps ease menstrual cramps for some women.
- Most contraceptive methods are cheap and accessible.
- Forgetfulness; especially if you’re on the pill. You run a very high risk of falling pregnant.
- Personally the idea of going on a method of contraception is to NOT have unprotected sex but to at least know that if an “accident” happens I shouldn’t worry about it. However, in most cases getting tested for HIV/Aids and being on a form of contraceptive method usually reads “Here’s to more raw sex.”
- Possibilities of trust issues. I’ve heard that most men aren’t very comfortable with the idea of their woman being on contraception because he thinks she will have multiple partners. (why are people having sex with people they don’t trust?)
- Unprotected sex is a mind blowing experience but with every stroke you stand a chance of contracting an STI. It’s unfortunate that you can’t keep your partners privates in a bag to guard them from being used elsewhere but if you’re engaging in unprotected sex be prepared for unpleasant surprises.
- I don’t have evidence or stats to back me up but some women have highlighted that some contraceptive methods pose a chance of being infertile in the long run.
Frankly speaking if I had known that sex came with so many complications I would have remained a virgin! As if that’s not enough there’s now a male contraceptive and it comes in the form of a pill. I don’t know about you but I know that I won’t have faith in a man having to be the one those kind of decisions in a relationship. A guy can forget an entire birthday let alone remember taking a pill; it’s simply not happening for me. I may as well go celibate!
If you’re in Zimbabwe be sure to check out some of the contraceptive methods available from my Blogger friend’s page over here. Did you know that the withdrawal method is a form of contraception; certainly not the best method out there, I have a 6 year old daughter to remind me of this every single day.
My sentiments remain the same. If you’re going to be having sex contraception should be a topic that should be discussed early on. Men and women should both be very much involved in sexual health issues women especially because at the end of the day the woman is the one that bears the burden of contraception gone wrong.
What are your thoughts on the subject of birth control in a relationship? Are you on any method, are you aware of the method your partner is on? Are you planning on having kids anytime soon? I’d love to hear from you.