5 Reasons To Take A Break From Dating

Before I start telling you why you should take a break from dating just know humans ain’t shit.  People don’t know who they are; most don’t have the slightest clue of what they do or don’t want and yet they want to drag you into their lives so that you can be a part of their mess.  From my view point, only when you are fully aware of who you are must you enter into a relationship other than that, stay single; learn and unlearn what you’re about one day at a time.

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Image from Pinterest

1. You focus too much on your partner and not enough on your own life.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being concerned about your partner.  However, if that’s the focus of your life then you just might have a problem.  We’ve all seen people who behave in this fashion and whose lives revolve around their significant others.  Sit at home all weekend waiting for them to suggest an outing, always celebrating their partners achievements and successes meanwhile they are doing nothing to upgrade themselves, never doing anything on their own because they “prefer to be with their SO”, obsessing about them, going on and on about how amazing they are which falls nothing short of deifying them.  Guys please work with me here; another human being is not a hobby.  You need to get a life outside this person.

2. You are not experiencing growth in your dating experiences.

Imagine never getting to try out new places to eat, new adventures, adopting new healthy habits, getting to meet new people and making new friends together.  Do think deeply about this; if you stagnate and remain the same person you were after dating someone then surely that relationship wasn’t really worth your while now, was it?  Relationships should make us grow.

3. You keep dating the same problematic characters.

Ever noticed how some people have a “type”?  Yes, that type that gives them sleepless nights and endless headaches.  The type you know deep in your heart of hearts is not good for you.  Sometimes it really isn’t them.  Sometimes it’s you.  You already know the recipe for the upcoming disaster but you entertain it anyway. You need to do yourself a favour and remember the famous words of Albert Einstein;

“Insanity is doing the same thing over & over again & expecting different results.” 

4. You are obsessed with getting into a relationship.

Ever stopped to ask yourself why you actually want to be in a relationship?  I know I have, countless times.  Sometimes it was for the strangest of reasons.  I would see beautiful couples on Instagram and think WOW they look so happy I also want that in my life.  Do you fall in love with the idea of being in love? Fear of missing out will take you to places that you will forever regret if you don’t manage it well.  So each time the need to be in a relationship pops up, take a step back and ask yourself WHY?

5. You just came out of a relationship or a bad break up.

Rebound relationships been there done that wouldn’t recommend it to when you are at your most vulnerable.  If you’re hurting you should be healing not dating.  Do not use someone as a crutch to get over your pain.  Then again people are different and if you feel you need to do that go right ahead but be warned that you may not be riding into the sunset for a ‘happily ever after’ ending.

What are some of the reasons you think one should take a break from dating? Please share your thoughts in the comments section.

©MaKupsy 2018

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Refuse To Settle For Less!

PRIORITY : a thing that is regarded as more important than others.

I am one of those people who believes in planning almost everything.  From what I am going to do from the moment I wake up, what form of exercise I will do that day, what I am going to wear, what I am going to eat, what I will do for my lunch break…generally how everything must go.  I would like to believe it’s the same for everyone else because you can’t tell me you just go through your day without a plan on what you will do with your day.  Okay, not everyone then but most people have a to do list, right?

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where do you find yourself on someone’s to do list?

Where is the problem exactly then, seeing that most people have to do lists that they work on day in and out?  My problem is when people around me choose to make me number 50 on their to do list and expect me to jump at the drop of a hat when they feel it’s time for me to show up. (Fortunately for me I don’t take that nonsense lightly). We all make time for the things we love or things that are important to us.  Here’s a good example; there is no way someone will call you to make a date at 8 pm and expect you to think that makes you special in any way.  Someone who really wants to see you will tell you when the day starts not at some ungodly hour.

Know your worth and if you realise that someone is taking you for granted and not treating you the way you should be then I say to you DO NOT SETTLE FOR LESS.  I know it all too well, I have been through this and I do not want to see anyone else going through it. Too many times we hope and wish that someone will one day see the light and put us first on their to do list.  I wouldn’t wait to see how that ends because it always ends with you going further down their list of priorities.  Be selfish with your time.  This life is too short to be fighting for someones attention when you can be putting your time and effort into other productive things…like shopping and working on how you can get a better and mind blowing orgasm by yourself. It’s all about self love.

The long and the short of it learn to discern where you are wanted and where you are simply getting your time wasted. The moment you have to beg, plead, negotiate for someone’s love, time or affection is the moment you leave because you deserve nothing but the best!

©MaKupsy 2016

Gava Restaurant – Sadza With Soul

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A few weeks back I had a serious traditional food craving and I was this close to losing my mind!  I asked everyone I could think of if they knew a place that made delicious traditional meal after working hours .  Most people couldn’t name a place and so I ended up tweeting @263chat for help and I got instant feedback!  How cool is it to have a platform where you can ask all things Zimbabwean and actually get a reply?  And so I made my way to Gava Restaurant.  The thing I liked the most before I even got there was that their kitchen was open till 9 pm and that meant any other time the food craving hit me I would know where and what time it would still be available.

Sadly this restaurant review won’t have much to go on about concerning the atmosphere because all I wanted to do on this particular day was to eat a nice hot meal prepared by someone else.  Methinks that is the one disadvantage of staying on your own.  Cooking for yourself becomes so monotonous and you end up sleeping on fruit or a sand-which.  Once I arrived at the restaurant I took a sit outside and the waiter was quick to bring the menu.  Seeing that I already knew what I wanted I ordered Sorghum Sadza with Chicken Stew (road runner) it came with green vegetables and beans.  The meal minus the refreshments cost $8.  There was a lot of meat in my plate I struggled to finish it but it was absolutely delicious.

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Why did I like Gava Restaurant?

  • It is close to town.
  • The staff was friendly and efficient.
  • You don’t have to wait till you start growing old to get your food.
  • They had a lovely selection of music.
  • The meals are reasonably priced.

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My rating on a scale of 1-10 is a 7. I will definitely go back for another meal one of these fine days.  I was thinking one of these lazy Sundays and get to experience it for a couple of hours.

MaKupsy