Social Media & Dating

Social media has taken relationships to a whole new level.  Now you get to publicly share your private and intimate moments that you indulge in with your significant other. It’s interesting to watch couples in love, swooning all over each other and posting selfies with on social media with cute captions.  However, I have mixed feelings when it comes to publicising who you are dating on social media platforms for the following reasons:

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Image from Pinterest

Pros

  1. When you are in love you want the whole world to know and it’s only normal to want your social media friends to share your happiness.
  2. When you post your significant other people will know they are taken and *hopefully* stay away.
  3. Posting your significant other is also a sign of confidence in who you are dating.

Cons

  1. If you need to conceal your significant other from the world then what the heck are the two of you doing together? Please note there is a difference between being private and being a big secret.
  2. Most people on social media have a sense of entitlement. They feel that just because you share pictures with your significant other they now have the right to know intimate details of your relationship; people prying and needing to know why a couple broke up.  I have been guilty of this myself at some point in my life.  It’s not a good trait, we should learn to mind our own business…then again, people make it our business!
  3. You can’t help but feel like you have to live up to social media expectations because people now expect to see demonstrations and expressions of your love on special occasions. Take a birthday for instance, people want to see what you get on your special day and if your significant other is really #BaeGoals or not (feel free to Google that hash tag).  Talk about pressure!
  4. Some people are attracted to someone who is already taken…need I say more?
  5. Imagine posting your significant other every single day on social media and then one day you break up and you have close to 100 pictures of them all over your online space. The stress of deleting each picture one by one is something I shudder to imagine.
  6. You can’t express your opinions about relationships in peace without people thinking you are talking about your significant other. You can’t even join the #MenAreTrash movement because we will quickly assume your man is trash too! L.O.L

Ever noticed how people with money don’t make noise about it?  Take Strive Masiyiwa for example, the man is a whole millionaire but you don’t hear ad nauseum about his success or how he spends his millions. I think it the same applies to couples who are genuinely in love.  They keep it classy, you know they are dating, they share pictures yes but they keep it to a minimum and you actually look forward to their social media posts.

Then there is this one guy whose name I shall not care to mention but brags about his financial status on social media platforms like, come on!  I mean dude, you have money, we get it but why do you feel the need to tell us ALL about your life in a bag of chips?  Gosh, is he annoying or what?!  These are my sentiments about couples who over-share on social media.  Why do you find it necessary to bombard people with posts about your significant other every other hour telling us how great your relationship is going? Sometimes I can’t help but feel that people like that feel inadequate and are seeking validation, then again that’s just me.

Showcasing your love on social media is just like having a wedding.  Some will be happy for you, others will not be amused and the rest might wish you misfortune.  BUT that doesn’t mean people should stop getting married because people will receive the news differently.  Love should be celebrated whenever it can be! – Batanai Tuwe

What are your thoughts on the subject?  Do you share pictures of your significant other on social media platforms?  If yes, how is that going for you so far?  If not, what’s the reason behind it?

©MaKupsy 2017

 

Marriage Is A Journey

Marriage is a journey.  I know this because I read it on the news feed of one of my favourite couples on Facebook.  I randomly stalk their page and each time I do so there is always something inspirational and heartwarming.  Today this is what I bumped into.

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Cynthia & Her Husband Sean

Marriage is like buying a second hand car. What attracted you to it was probably the shiny paint, the interior, the sound system etc, and it felt like a “new car” to you.
You then bought the car , entered into a relationship with it to start your own car journey experience. Your journey with the “new car” was an adventure as you began finding out things you never knew existed! 


You set off to go on your journey which is 1500 miles away, but it doesn’t bother you because you know the journey will be worth it! A third into your journey you hear a weird sound and you smell  something that wasn’t there before you can’t put your finger on it but you know something isn’t right!


You’re at a strange place with a now strange car and you’re faced with a dilemma!
1. Do you get the car checked out, fixed so you can continue on your journey? Or…..
2. Do you accept it as a loss, abort the journey forfeit your destination and find your way back to where you started? 


Marriage is a journey…


It’s an adventure, quite exciting and exhilarating at the beginning, but then the going will get tough at some point, you begin to see characteristics you never knew existed, you get disappointed, you feel let down, angry  feel like throwing in the towel.  You feel like it’s easier to just get a brand new car, but even those break down at some point too, so what will happen then??


You get to know your car  you get it fixed, you continue with the journey, it will be an experience, your own adventure, embrace it, focus on your destination!! It’ll be worth it.
Marriage is not for quitters, neither is it for the faint hearted!

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Cynthia is a Gym Addict and you can find her on Instagram where she always posts some mouth watering food and you can also find her on Facebook ,where she shares her fitness workouts.

Are you married?  If yes, what are some of the marriage nuggets you have to share?  Feel free to drop your thoughts in the comments section.

©MaKupsy 2017

Saying Goodbye Is Not Always The Answer

Its 7pm, where are you?

Sorry dear, I’m running late.

I thought we agreed you would pick me up for dinner at 6:30 pm, like really, what’s up with that?!!

I’m on my way, I have just been delayed.

You know what, don’t come anymore, I can’t believe you made me wait this whole time; I’m going out with my friends instead!

But I’m nearly there.

No, forget it, actually, fuck this relationship, I’m done, if you can’t even keep time then what’s the point?

Can we just talk about this before you make such a drastic decision?

Silence

Within minutes he shows up, I jump into the car and there is nothing but dead silence until we reach our destination.  I diagnosed myself as suffering from Anger Management Issues (Whatever those are) because the way I would easily get annoyed the heck was completely out of this world.  I don’t know if it’s fortunate or unfortunate that I had a very patient boyfriend back then but because of him I learnt a thing or two about relationships.

The number one problem with me is that I don’t tolerate a lot of things.  Be it poor hygiene, not keeping time, typos and grammatical errors; I know you think this one is absurd but I find it a real turn off if the person I am supposed to be dating bombards me with messages that have typos, I easily lose focus and stop replying their messages.  If you think that’s being melodramatic it’s because you haven’t read my blog post titled Miss Petty.  Unfortunately for me because I have become very set in my ways over the years it has become increasingly difficult to compromise.  I blame staying on my own throughout my 20’s, I just don’t have room for someone else’s bullshit.  Wait, what am I supposed to blogging about again?  I think I am losing the plot, let me get back to the story at hand.

Seeing that we have been delayed we have missed our dinner reservation he decides we go to a laid back place instead and chill and have drinks and a meal.  However, he doesn’t tell me this because he knows for a fact that I am fuming already as it is.

We get to the parking lot and he sighs heavily and starts talking…

I honestly don’t understand why you just won’t give me a chance MaKupsy.  It’s been how many months now but each time I try to do something nice for you I am always greeted by being ignored or you simply tell me to take a hike.  What you don’t realise is that I have fallen in love with you.  I have tried so many ways to get through to your heart with zero luck.  Despite all your flaws I still want to be with you but clearly I am losing the plot somewhere.  Relationships are not meant to be easy and it seems like each time we have a problem you are ready to abandon ship.  It’s not supposed to be like that sweetheart; we are in this together and the only way this can grow into something solid and meaningful is if we communicate and move forward without you always saying hauchandida. (I don’t love you anymore).  Take today for example, when I told you I was running late you were already in defense mode and telling me you were making alternative plans.  Why didn’t you wait for me to show up to find out the reason(s) why I had been delayed and then take it from there instead of automatically assuming that I am taking your time for granted?  Tell you what, today is going to be a great evening and despite how it started off we are going to paint the town red, and no, you don’t have to say anything today, just take your time and digest what I just said.

He gets out of the car and comes to the passenger side of the car and opens the door for me like the gentleman that he is…

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Image from Pinterest

I never got to reply him in person on that day because did we have a great night out or what?!  However, the talk we had before our date made me realise something.  I had real underlying issues that needed to be dealt with.  I figured that the biggest problem was that once upon a time I had given my EVERYTHING to someone who did not reciprocate and it left me spent.  Each time I dated someone; at the back of my head I kept thinking that my current boyfriend was going to do something to hurt me so I always had my suitcase packed and ready to move on before I got my heart entangled in a relationship I assumed would leave me heart broken.  What I didn’t realise was that I was doing myself more harm than good because after all was said and done I was the one missing out on a chance of happiness while holding onto past disappointments.  How sad?  In my head everyone was like my ex boyfriend(s) and I never gave them a real chance.

The universe had other plans though, she sent someone who was patient and understanding.  Even though half the time we dated I threw major temper tantrums he still stood by me and taught me the art of communication and reminded me that there were still a few good men(5 of them and counting) with good intentions out there.

©MaKupsy 2017

8 Wallet Friendly Date Ideas

Apparently dating is for the emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially ready.  Emphasis on financially.  Dating costs money but that doesn’t mean it has to break your bank.  There are different activities you can enjoy with your partner that will leave you both happy and your wallet smiling.  Fancy dress up and expensive dates are lovely but they certainly can’t be an everyday thing, sometimes all you need is to get back to the basics with that special someone in your life.

I have a list of 8 different ideas that I think you should try out.  You know I recommend nothing but exciting things so make sure you try out at least one of them; you can thank me later.

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Image from Pinterest

  1. Picnic.  You can do this from anywhere actually, just let your creative juices flow.   Picnic at the back of a truck, the balcony of your house, at the local park or depending on how daring you are; on the roof top.  I would suggest you try out a sunset picnic which can later turn into a star gazing date.  I am such a romantic, I know!
  2. Movie.  If you stay in Harare then happy days.  You can take advantage of the half price Tuesday deal at the movies and pay for two people for the price of one.  Add the Terrific Tuesday pizza deal and you have both a movie and a meal in one date!  It will cost you give or take USD15 what’s not to love?
  3. Coffee.  It’s winter this part of the world and any date that guarantees to keep you warm is more than welcome.  Cake at my favourite coffee place is USD3 a slice for any cake of your choice and coffee is USD2.  It will give you a chance to enjoy as many cups of coffee as you please because the cake slices are huge and one cup of coffee will not do justice to it.
  4. Cook.  Nothing like a home cooked meal made with tender loving care.  The plus side of cooking together is that you and your partner get to bond and have some intimate time together.  Instead of spending a lot of money eating out you can get your favourite ingredients and prepare your favourite meal plus dessert!

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    Image from Pinterest

  5. Ice cream.  Now this is the best date idea ever because ice cream doesn’t cost much.  You will just have to make sure it’s a sunny day so that you get to enjoy the beautiful weather together with your ice cream and get to take a nice stroll together and hold hands.  When was the last time you did that?
  6. Fun Run. There is always a run of sort taking place.  Just so you know, I host Fitness In The Park events every month and they are FREE.  Exercise will give you a chance to challenge each other and also release those feel good hormones.  Aaaaand, I read somewhere that exercise and great sex are best friends 🙂
  7. Drinks.  Become a mixologist for the night.  Take a trip to the liquor store and get your favourite alcoholic beverages.  Instead of going out on that Friday night stay at home and experiment with different alcohol mixtures.  Make sure you create a music playlist that will have you dance the night away.  The great thing is that if you pass out you will be in the comfort of your home.
  8. Comedy.  I know King Kandoro hosts Comedy Shows every Tuesday for free.  On other occasions his shows go for USD2.  There is no excuse not to go for something that will leave you in stitches.  Comedy is a sure way to look at life from the fun side and if you two are trying to bring some laughter back into your relationship this is a way to forget about the fighting and get some humour into the mix.
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King Kandoro

I hope you try out these ideas and let me know how they work out for you.  By the way, the ideas are open to both men and women. Ladies, surprise your man with one of these dates sometime soon and men, if you have not been taking your girlfriend out perhaps this list might help.

What activities do you get up to in your area that don’t break your budget?  I would love to hear them.

©MaKupsy 2017

The Dating Game

 

Early morning phone call…

Him: Hello, how are you this lovely morning?

Her: I’m great honey how are you you today?

Him: I’m good babes. I was thinking, how about I pick you up around 10am and we do breakfast and catch up?  It has been a really long week and we haven’t spent time together.  We can decide what to do with the rest of the day after breakfast; make sure you wear that dress I like.

Her: That would be a lovely way to start the weekend.  Let me get some more shut eye so that I have enough energy for the rest of the day.  I’m excited already; I hope we are trying out that new place we saw the last time?

Him: Yes we are and make sure you don’t take forever to get ready I know you babes.

Her: I promise I will be early even though we both know that’ impossible.  Will see you soon honey.  Kisses

Him: Bye babes see you soon.

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Shingi & Tonde

Do these things still happen?  If yes, please show me the direction so that I can go as well!  I remember conversations like these when I was in my early 20’s.  I LOVED it, it was more real, more sentimental.  I blame the very first boyfriend I had.  That guy was probably from another planet because he really went all out.  There is no experience he did not take me through.  There was never a dull moment the time we dated, surprises were his middle name.  You know how women just love those.  When I look back I realise that he took his time to know what my interests were and coupled them with his so that we were both happy in the end.  Picnics, dinners, breakfasts, flowers, birthday trips, my first flying experience, road trips, learning how to drive…the list is endless and really making me nostalgic right about now.  If I am honest with myself after dating him the experiences with the people I dated just went downhill from there and everything became so obvious, he killed the magic guys, he killed it!  LOL

When my friends and I have our random chats about men we are always entertained!  We have concluded that there are two types of guys; the ones that will take you kunogocha (going for a braai) and buy you a lot of alcohol and hope you get drunk.  To think all that money could have been used for a more intimate sit in date.

Then the other ones who will take you out for a proper date, make arrangements that actually involve things you also enjoy doing then pick you up and sometimes even buy you a dress for the date!  Yes, those guys are out there and they do exist; you just don’t find them in the yellow pages.  I am not saying “kunogocha” can’t be termed as a date but surely when you are still trying to get to know someone the options are plenty and that one should be the last one on your list.  Are you trying to impress someone or trying to never see them again?

I remember reading somewhere that when a man is into you; you will know it through his actions.  Can we safely conclude that those who don’t make an effort are really not into a woman?

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Another beautiful date idea; go for a photo shoot. 🙂

If you are trying to get attention from a woman by all means let your creative juices flow!  The early days can make or break your dating chances.  You want to be remembered as that guy who did the one thing that no other guy had done for her.  Let the other random no so exciting dates come after you have won her over.  At least you would have shown her that you are capable of keeping things exciting.  Being spontaneous really goes a long way.  I know you are reading this and thinking a relationship involves two people why is the man being the one to do all the work here?  Well, the answer is simple; the man is the hunter, us women are just out here waiting to be hunted.

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Shingi & Tonde

Thank you to Shingi and Tonde for the beautiful pictures.  They are my favourite Twitter couple and when I have free time I stalk them and just smile.  Love is a beautiful thing to watch and they do it so well.  I wish them nothing but love and happiness.

Let’s talk.  What are your thoughts on dating?  What have been your best and worst experiences so far?  Is your man calling you to make a date or it’s whatever happens that day happens.  Guys, how are you spicing up your dating game?

I hope your weekend was great!

©MaKupsy 2017

 

 

 

 

 

Signs Of A Stingy Guy

I bumped into this YouTube video when I was busy searching for something on the internet this morning.  I want to hear your thoughts on it before I write up my opinion on it by end of day today.  Grab your earphones and listen in.

 

Let me break this down…

  1. There really are guys like that out there.  They will tell you about the latest property they bought, the latest addition to their “fleet of ex Japanese cars” but they will never actually spend money on you to show you just how much they are living it up in life. (insert eye roll here)
  2. I have to agree with the Vlogger here, why is your supposed man waiting on you to ask for things.  Your real man knows your needs in and out and there is really no need for you to be policing him to do them for you.  If he doesn’t want to do them then it’s cool, just don’t nag a brother and do you, but guess what, someone won’t be getting some for a very long time.  We were in disagreement on this opinion with a friend of mine when I shared this video with her.  She said;

    l think we ladies do equate material things and sex then when a guy says can l sleep with you then I buy you lunch or whatever he offers on the table; we always get insulted and say he is crazy is he equating my pussy to lunch? 

We are all entitled to our opinion right?  I won’t argue this one out I have too much to say right now I might end up losing the plot!

3. To be honest, when you meet a woman there are certain standards that she has for herself and if you are only there to ” run her down” then what are you even doing in her life?  Relationships cost money people, I once read somewhere that relationships are for the ready; FINANCIALLY, physically, emotionally, the whole shebang.

4. Ladies, I know a lot of us have had the “I will sort it out tomorrow” guys in our lives.  The tomorrow never comes! I find it pretty annoying actually.  If someone does not want to do something why not simply go ahead and say I don’t want to instead of having someone think you are actually going to do it.  What’s all the more interesting is that when a woman asks for something a man act like he suddenly has a hearing impairment but when it’s time for trying to get laid he is very much alert.  Funny!

5.”Is her father doing the things you do to her?”  That line has to be the one that caught my attention.  I have heard a lot of guys on Twitter say that “I am not her father” line but trust they are doing all sorts of acrobatics to their said girlfriends and when it comes to the crunch they throw in that line.  Shame on you guys!

You know what I think.  At the end of the day even if you go to work, you have your life going; if you have a man in your life it’s just a great feeling to know he will do things for you from the goodness of his heart.  The moment you start asking him to do things for you it kills the fun and dries up a woman’s vagina to be honest.  How do you even get wet for someone who needs to be told that my hair is a mess, does he not have eyes?

Sooooo, are guys supposed to be spending money on their girlfriend(s) or not?  Do you think if he does not spend money when you are still dating he will do the same when you are married to him?

P.S This was by far the most hilarious vlog I have watched on YouTube this week.  I still want to know where people get these Chris Brown type of guys who let you just spend his money and even come back for more once you finish spending it!

©MaKupsy 2016

It’s All Fun & Games Until You Start Staying Together!

Dating can be a really fun experience.  From the dates, the gifts,the getting to know each other phase.  Your partner seems perfect, too perfect sometimes you start thinking they might be too good to be true.  In my opinion it’s like that because you don’t get to spend ALL your time with them.  I think the one time you truly get to find out who you are dating is when you start living together.  I once tried out cohabiting and the first few months were bliss.  Nothing can compare to waking up next to the person who makes your heart go pitter-patter.  Lovely as it may seem, there are a few issues that come with living together, let me list a few of them.  This was my experience…

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Sleeping Patterns

I sleep really early.  On a good day I am lights out anytime before 9:30pm.  When I go to sleep I want complete darkness in the room and no background noise.  That wasn’t the same for my partner.  He loved watching TV in bed and he used to wake up at ungodly hours to watch NFL games.  You can imagine how annoyed I got because that meant I would be wide awake and most times I had work the next day and that just made me very cranky come morning.  He was happy he got to watch the game, I was pissed off because I didn’t have enough sleep.  Drama, drama!

Bad Habits

We all have our little bad habits that are magnified once we start spending all our time with someone. Things like:

  • not putting the toilet seat back down when you finish using the loo.
  • not flushing after you finishing doing whatever business you choose to partake in in the loo.
  • farting in the presence of your partner. I know this one becomes inevitable after staying together for a long time BUT personally, it’s a no no.
  • not picking up after yourself.
  • not making the bed, in my world if you are the last one to leave the bed it’s your job to sure you make it, sounds fair to me.

Household Chores

This can be a real train smash if one of you is lazy.  You might end up feeling taken for granted because all the household chores will be on your list of things to do.  From experience I have concluded that everyone has something that they don’t mind doing housework wise and something they absolutely can’t stand!  For example, I don’t mind doing laundry, it’s the ironing part I can’t deal with.  I used to do all the laundry and once it was dry I would fold it and pack it away and iron as I go.  My partner found it absolutely ridiculous.  He believed once laundry was done it had to be ironed there and then. For the sake of peace and progress we split that chore and made sure I washed and he ironed, everyone is happy.  However, the other chores around the house were a real mission because he was lazy and I ended up doing everything else and resented him as each day passed by.

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Finances

I like saving for a rainy day.  I am that one person who probably has some money stashed away somewhere for emergencies.  I don’t believe in spending all my money and then worrying about how I am going to get to my next pay cheque.  My partner on the other hand loved blowing his money.  We would sit down, draw up a budget and agreed that come end of the month we would do a,b,c,d.  You don’t know what frustration is until you get home and find out that your partner has bought a $50 shirt that wasn’t a part of the budget and now you have to forgo important things that month.  It’s at that point that you realise that people clearly have different priorities.  Don’t get me wrong, getting yourself new things is all fine and dandy but when you have talked about things beforehand it would be important to communicate such decisions for the sake of peace and progress.

Sex

This blog would be incomplete without mentioning  sex.  Trust me when I tell you, the sex will be amazing.  Well, it was for me.  Sex at any time of day, no need to send a message asking “Sweetiepie how long are you going to take to get here?” when you are feeling hot and bothered because you have your partner with you.  You can explore, experiment and get enough the orgasms because there is no rush to go anywhere.  BUT there is obviously a big but in this; when things are not going well between a couple especially due to some of the issues I have mentioned above sex might not even happen.  Couples that are usually unhappy end up not having sex and just become room mates who happen to share a bed.  Thankfully we didn’t experience this because maybe we were just sex addicts (if sex saved relationships we would probably still be together) but for some I have heard that you can go a pretty long time without sex when your partner is mad at you.

Depression

This is an actual thing!  When you stay with someone chances of feeling depressed are actually very high especially when things are not going well between the two of you.  I remember we used to have cases where after a verbal fight he would walk out of the house and not come back.  Sometimes he would go for a whole weekend and I would be worried sick to my stomach not knowing if him walking away meant we had broken up, if he was alive, if he still wanted to talk to me…I had a million questions going through my head and him not picking up my calls or replying my messages made me all the more miserable.  I ended up feeling depressed and even after he came back and we talked things through in my heart I was never settled because I kept thinking one day he is going to walk away and never come back.  I had no hold on him, after all we were cohabiting and not legally married…

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To be honest, if you are thinking of cohabiting I say give it a try knowing that it might actually work out for you and if marriage is the end goal for both of you it might happen.  They say compromise is key right?  If you find that special someone you can gladly compromise then by all means don’t let my experience stop you.

Personally I won’t try it again, I have crossed out my bucket list in that department.  It was beautiful while it lasted but I love my space too much to have anyone else all up in it.  All that freedom to just be myself and do absolutely nothing all day in peace is priceless.  Then again I can’t exactly be alone for the rest of my life it would be nice to have someone to share all my highs and lows.  What would probably work would be staying in different apartments in the same building but we are still a couple or just getting married and buying a big house where you can always retreat to a different room when you are feeling upset and reconcile when you have cooled down…

After all is said and done, what matters the most is how you feel about each other and how far you are willing to go to make your relationship.  Do what works for you and for the betterment of your living arrangement because at the end of the day what’s important is your happiness.  When you decide to stay with your partner get in it with open eyes and an open heart.

Have you been in a cohabiting scenario before.  How did it work for you?  Are you still together with your cohabiting partner?  Are there any tips you would want to share on how to make living together more manageable?  Are you pro or anti cohabiting?

©MaKupsy 2016

30 Things Women Want Men To Know

I was really trying to avoid blogging about anything concerning sex but I guess it was highly inevitable.  Today I am sharing those things most women wish men knew but simply don’t tell them.  My personal thoughts are points 1-10 and 30 and the rest of the points are from the women I asked.  Here’s hoping no one takes offence but maybe takes notes instead and make sex something both you and your partner enjoy.

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  1. It is not about the quantity but the quality of sex. Why are you trying to have 8 rounds of 2 minute sex??  One session of good sex is good enough and if you are doing things right and hitting the spot then by all means rest assured I am fine.
  2. Size does matter. For me that is, that motion for the ocean line doesn’t hold water.  I am a big girl, I like big things.
  3. Sex in the dark? NO, switch on the light please I want to see what’s going on.
  4. If you have to ask “how was it” you know the sex was lousy.
  5. Do no keep asking me how it was; you are not ready for the truth.
  6. Just because the last woman you slept with liked anal sex does not mean the next woman does. Ask before trying to sneak your dick  into my ass hole!
  7. I don’t fake orgasms, if I didn’t cum I didn’t cum, it is really that simple.
  8. Oral sex is a big turn on. Eat that pussy like it’s the cure for some life threatening disease!  Note I said EAT not small little licks!
  9. Do not bite the clitoris! Just because it is shaped like a jelly bean it does not mean it was made for biting.  That is a sensitive organ, be gentle.
  10. Don’t be lazy, put your back in it!
  11. Take off ALL your clothes. Why do you leave some clothes on? Socks, vest, take it off we want to see all your body parts.
  12. Screaming doesn’t mean we are enjoying it. It can mean one of three things. Maybe we just want to stroke your ego and make you think you are pumping us proper, we want you to stop or it’s actually painful. LOL
  13. We don’t always orgasm, but that’s okay. Do not make it a big deal because if you do we end up faking orgasms.
  14. Sex should not always be about a good fuck. Sometimes a woman wants some good old deep, delicious and slow love making.
  15. Change of scenery will definitely spice up the sex. The bedroom becomes boring. Sex in the shower anyone?
  16. We love surprises; introduce goodies like chocolate, strawberries, yoghurt, edible lingerie…
  17. Take a bath! Who do you want to climb on top of smelling like you were ploughing in a field all day?
  18. Sweat is a NO NO. Show up smelling divine and maybe a different cologne every now and again is a huge turn on.
  19. Do not be a selfish lover, wait for the woman to orgasm.
  20. Do not keep switching tempo. We do like variety BUT constantly changing tempo interrupts our flow. Worst time to switch is when we are about to orgasm.  Do you have any idea what it takes to finally get an orgasm??? Do not tempt us to punch you in the face during sex!
  21. If a woman is not in the mood for sex she is not. No amount of parading in the room naked will change her mind.
  22. Foreplay is more than just sticking your fingers up her pussy.
  23. Enjoying sex does not make me a freak.
  24. Sex is meant to be fun.
  25. If you expect to get head you better wash up your dick properly!
  26. Women probably love sex more than men but our society has raised us in a way where showing that labels you a loose woman.
  27. Most women are shy to initiate sex but in her mind she has ripped off your clothes and done all sorts of unimaginable things!
  28. Women are horniest when they are on their period. Some actually don’t mind sex during that time of the month.
  29. You don’t know women like that. Just because your friend told you his woman liked this, it doesn’t mean I will like it.
  30. TALK, TALK, TALK! You must communicate during sex. That way you both say what you want.  Laughing is even welcome when things go wrong.  That’s the whole point of sex, to have a good time.  Give specifics and help each other to enjoy amazing sex!

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*Side Note – Remember to practice safe sex.  If you have sex without any form of contraception, then you may be at risk of a pregnancy (as well as a sexually transmitted infections).

MaKupsy

Day 22 – List Of Things That I Won’t Do (Again) Even If You Paid Me

  1. I will not get pregnant and go through labour again, like ever!
  2. I will not do laundry as long as I can afford to pay the maid.  I actually haven’t done any laundry since January this year.
  3. I will not get artificial nails, they damage my nails and leave them looking unhealthy.images (2)
  4. I will not date just because I am lonely and need an attention boost.
  5. I will not run more than 10K during the week, the day at work is nothing short of painful in all aspects!
  6. I will not drink to get drunk.
  7. I will not share accommodation with anyone, it is unnecessary drama that I can live without.
  8. I will not fart in the presence of my man.  Ask anyone I dated, I do not roll like that.  I still don’t know why though.
  9. I will not pretend to like someone or make conversation when I clearly do not want to do so.
  10. I will not travel to South Africa in winter!

MaKupsy

Why Women Cheat

 

Brace yourself, the following post is not for the faint hearted.  Women cheat, it’s just that they don’t go on talking about it the same way guys do. Some of the information may surprise you, some will enlighten you, you may roll your eyes and judge but that’s the situation on the ground.   Life happens and at some point some women have cheated or think about cheating.  I suppose not everyone was cut out to be “Miss Goody Goody Two Shoes.”  A few women share their stories below:

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Image from Google

Escape from reality

Yes I have cheated because I met someone who excited me more than my partner did. Someone who made me feel alive at the time. Usually it’s fun yes but it mostly ends badly. Fact is that the guy you cheated with was never a serious thing. He was a whirlwind romance, an escape really. Sometimes the one you cheat with probably has someone in his life and he is also cheating. However there are the rare ones who are single and will actually try making things work out in that cheating scenario. Best cases are the relationships that may come out of cheating.

Forbidden fruit

I have cheated. I cheated because I was selfish and my needs were not being met and it was frustrating, got an escape, all the attention from the guy I was cheating with.  It was not everything, obviously the fun was that it was stolen wares they sell twice as dear. He called every morning, kept tabs on me, made me feel special but I never wanted to leave my guy, even though my cheating partner was okaish, It was just that a little fling to keep me sane. I eventually couldnt keep up, I loved my guy but my needs were not being met, and I knew we had to talk. The best things in life are not free, they are forbidden. the guilt, the adrenaline of cheating OMG.  I loved/love my boyfriend with all my heart and he may kill me if he knew he may be very disappointed, but ndakanakirwa hangu(I had a good time) please!!!  The other guy’s flaws made me realise my own boyfriends good side, I learnt that my guy loves me maturely and respectfully, he is human and honest, he is not going out of his way to impress me all the time but he loves me, I gave him the most breathtaking kiss ever the next time I was with him he asked what that was for, I lied…To be honest, all that kiss was saying was, I am sorry I had strayed I love you. For the record, I left the guy I was cheating with because I couldn’t give him my all. It was superficial, I had to be real with myself.  On the flip side, I learnt to communicate better with my guy, and understand him as well. Once we were in sync, paradise was peaceful again.  And you know what? I would never have known if I hadn’t cheated, maybe, who knows?

Intellectually Stimulating

Personally, I like an intellectually challenging man, but once I feel like you’re unable to stimulate my mind, or failing to keep up, I side track.  I’m attracted to men’s minds before physical appearance and all.  That was one reason I cheated once.  The other reason I think some women cheat is that you get bored of the same person.  It’s not so much the routine that you get bored of but when you know someone in and out you can predict things like reactions.  Those things then annoy you and you end up wanting a “change of environment” so to speak. Lastly, some women will forever compare their boyfriends to other men no matter what good he does.  It’s the comparing thing that exposes your man’s flaws so much, you tend to start getting attracted to the men you thing have “better” features; more money, are more caring, more attentive, bigger dick…the list is endless.

Pondering

I have thought about it. But I didn’t get to doing it because I felt bad. But it was during those times when he doesn’t give you as much attention as he used to then there’s some guy who’s there giving you all the attention that you’re craving. I think men just get a little too comfortable and stop doing what they used to do. Its the little things that they stop doing that you tend to notice; things like getting you something on his way home or telling you stuff that he used to tell you all the time that they end up taking for granted.

 

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Image from Google

And I am sure you are all wondering if I have cheated before? Well, the answer is yes.  Not that it is something to be proud of but I had my reasons.  My number one problem was that I did not forgive my then boyfriend for cheating on me.  Instead I took him back and pretended all was well while in the meantime I was planning my revenge.  It was both emotional and physical cheating and in my mind I blamed my partner for turning me into this person who wanted to pay an eye for an eye.  I really wanted him to feel the same pain he put me through, the sleepless nights, the broken heart.  Did I regret ever cheating on him? No, not even a single bit, because we were even, he cheated, I cheated so I didn’t have to grin and bear it anymore.  Will I cheat again? NO that is seriously emotionally damaging and I do not plan on going through the lies and the secrets, too draining.

Moral of the story?  Women cheat for all sorts of reasons but thankfully it is not every woman who does.  And guess what, MOST times when women do cheat, they don’t get caught…

MaKupsy