Adele – Someone Like You

Love is one of the most beautiful things you can experience in this lifetime if it’s reciprocal.  However, if you are one of the unlucky few who got served a huge dose of unrequited love you will know exactly how much pain can come from it.

Thankfully over the years I have had the chance to reflect and take note of some of the mistakes I made in the past where love was concerned.  In the past I have paired myself up with people who actually did not love or care about me.  I saw the signs and chose to ignore them.  A slight sign of concern was automatically mistaken for love.  For me love had to make my heart go pitter patter, lose my senses, lose sleep and have me going through extremes of happiness and sadness.  That was clearly a lot to take in in the name of love.

I used to be a bitter woman, I was mad at the world.  Mad that I loved someone who did not see all the things I did in the name of love.  More than anything I was mad at myself for not seeing something was not good for me and simply walking away when I still had the chance to do so.

I am happy to say that what I view love to be has completely changed.  For me love will not leave me close to feeling a panic attack, love will complete me, love will give me a warm, calm and confident feeling towards my partner.  I don’t think I still get butterflies, maybe it’s an age thing; but I certainly feel that this is right when I am with the perfect match.

I no longer feel anything towards the man who once shattered my heart to irreparable little pieces; I am indifferent towards him.  You will be surprised to note that this very song used to bring me to tears each time I listened to it but now I listen to it and recall that it used to be his favourite song.  Through it all in as much as things didn’t work out between us we had our happy moments.  They didn’t last but for the season they were supposed to they brought a smile to my face.

It’s important to take a step back whenever you get the chance to and find out where you go wrong.  It’s easy to sit down and blame the world for things going wrong in your life when most times you are the very source of your own pain.  You can’t choose who you love though you can try very hard to make sure you love someone who at least feels the same way about you.

I have made it my personal mission to continue to grow myself in love.  How?  By doing things that bring me joy, filling my days with happy moments, understanding that not everyone will understand the intensity that comes with me and above all else to keep learning and unlearning habits that might hinder my progress.  Not everyone will understand what I am about but the right one will know that I am amazing just the way I am.

We live yes, but how many of us actually take time to learn?  

 

 

 

©MaKupsy 2017

Album Review : While I Was Away (Prayersoul)

Music is the art of thinking with sounds. – Jules Combarieu

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Prayersoul

I had made one too many promises to attend one of Prayersoul’s events but last Friday I told myself that come what may I was going to go and watch his live performance.  The venue was well laid out with a comfortable sitting area, drinks that were reasonably priced and a bonfire to keep us warm because winter nights are not being very friendly at the moment. (well thought out if you ask me) Prayersoul was interactive with the intimate crowd throughout his performance.  That makes a world of difference because not only did he get to play his music he also took time to share his story with his biggest fans.  I found that to be one of the outstanding things about the whole show.  I got myself a copy of his new album While I Was Away and I could not wait to get home and have a listen.  Attending this do was my highlight of the week, I didn’t regret it at all.  It was a beautiful experience and you should have been there!

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While I Was Away is Prayersoul’s Second Album.  The NeoSoul musician released his 10 Track album early this year.  The album genre is mainly NeoSoul but it has a blend of a lot of African Nuances in percussion, guitars, rhythm, and vernacular lyrics in most songs but clearly all soulful.  I listened to his album all weekend long and I must say, I was not disappointed.

I already have not one but four favourite tracks from his album and you should have a listen.

Track 3: Uxolo

This was a pleasant surprise.  I didn’t realise that Prayersoul was a Bulawayo boy! Nothing wins me as much as listening in to music that has vernacular lyrics.  English is alright no doubt but vernacular always brings the message home.  In this track he sings about forgiveness.

Track 4 : Million Reasons

My mind went back in time.  It reminded me of the days when love was honest, pure, no games and you were not afraid to be vulnerable.  Remember that time you could sit down with your partner and count the many ways why they meant the world to you?  We are now living in times where you have to extremely guard your heart because you have no idea what the next person’s intentions are.  This is something a lot of people can relate to, when you get your hands on his album make sure this is one of the first tracks you listen to.

Track 5: Go

Screaming!!! The moment I listened to this my mind went straight to Zumba.  It has a Samba feel to it.  I have added it to my running playlist.  I already have a mental image of what the music video would look like.  Women in short dresses, men in tight pants and shirts unbuttoned down to reveal their chests, everyone sweating from all the dancing, smokey room by the beach and some men seated and enjoying the music while smoking some cigars!!  It will be a great setup to go with this track that was clearly made for dancing.

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Prayersoul

After listening to this album one three many times and obviously annoying the heck out of my neighbours I finally got a chance to read through his shout outs.  What pulled at my heart strings was his last shout out that he gave to his wife, Nadine.  You know how they say you always save the best for last…It is beautiful to watch couples celebrate and support each other especially on a creative journey that a lot of people do not understand.

Thanks to attending his live show I got to find out a few things I didn’t know about Prayersoul.

  • He writes his own songs.
  • His favourite social media space is Facebook.
  • He was born in Bulawayo.
  • He moved to Masvingo for High School and University education.
  • He plays a little bit of bass guitar and a bit of piano.
  • He has a BSc in Social Sciences.  When he was looking for a job he would occasionally perform and he started getting calls for his performances.  He never got a call for any of the CVs for his Degree.  He started getting paid for his performances and that became his job.
  • He facilitates for guitar lessons for age groups starting 4.5 years to as old as possible, watch his social media for details.
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Prayersoul & MaKupsy 🙂

Upcoming Events…

Look out for promo events featuring Prayersoul at Chez Zandi , Organiks and a couple of Prayersoul launch concerts and these are mainly to connect with his fans before he travels out of the country.

You can keep in touch on any of his social media pages:

  1. Facebook
  2. Instagram
  3. Twitter
  4. www.prayersoul.com
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my signed copy 🙂 USD5

This is my first album review and I can safely rate 8 out of 10 for While I Was Away.   You have to do yourself a favour and attend one of his events, his live performances are captivating.  You know I always recommend quality things and this album will be worth your money, trust me.  If you are looking for an album that will soothe your soul and take you to a happy place then you’re in luck!  Prayersoul is a talented man and I wish him all the beautiful things on his creative journey.  Keep making soulful music Mr Soul!

 

Prayersoul says the best advice he ever got when he was starting out on his journey was that you need to find out what makes you unique because everyone else is already doing the same thing that you are doing.  Find your Africanness! 

©MaKupsy 2017

Love is…Serendipity

You never see it coming and the next thing you know unconditional love unconditional love; she ain’t looking for no diamonds and digging for no gold just somebody to love unconditional love…

I looooove me some Jah Cure.  His music speaks to my soul.  This is one of my favourite tracks by him and I can never get enough of it.  The only side effect to this track is that it leaves me feeling all mushy, but a mushy good way.

What I have realised about love is that it comes when you least expect it.  That moment when you are all relaxed, no “God send me a partner already!” thoughts on your mind, busy getting on with your life and BAM! LOVE HITS YOU.  That kind of love is precious.

There are too many people in the world trying to be someone or something they are not or trying to feel things that they don’t feel.  This has probably contributed to love not being as pure as it used to be or rather as it is supposed be.  Most people have an agenda when it comes to relationships.

I would like to believe everyone wants that kind of love Jah Cure sings about but the biggest question I have for you is are you willing to give unconditional love?

P.S I know if Cyber Bae is reading this he is just rolling his eyes and saying “there goes Cupid’s Apprentice”; he calls me that because I still believe true love is out there somewhere, the only difference is only a few people get to experience it.

Love is serendipity.

©MaKupsy 2017

The Other Woman

Love her or hate her, the other woman exists and chances are she will continue to exist till the end of time.  I’m not saying your boyfriend or husband has her; not all men are cut out for that.  However, if you are one of the unfortunate few he has one and it is highly likely that she is not going anywhere anytime soon.

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Image from Google

I was the other woman, once upon a time…how did I end up there?  A case of a long distance relationship gone wrong and after that I told myself I was not going to do relationships until further notice so a situationship was more ideal for me then.  Couple that with insecurities from a failed relationship and not realising my worth, I easily settled for being the other woman in a heartbeat.  I used to enjoy the thrill of the secret relationship, the attention was priceless because he would try to compensate for the time he was not able to be with me.

This is a phase in my life I look back to and ask myself what the heck was I thinking? But you know what they say, everything that happens to you is a learning curve.  Thankfully that phase only lasted a short while and was over before it even started because I clearly could not stand being an option in his life.  Believe me when I tell you that kind of emotional stress is not good for anyone, at all!   Ask me if I will ever travel down that road again?  The answer is a definite NO!  It was a phase I am not proud of to date.

That is one of my favourite tracks by Changing Faces – The Other Woman and they are mainly singing about why they are no longer willing to share a man because they have finally realised what they deserve. (love is not so blind after all) However, not all women share the same sentiments because below are a few who are currently the other woman and not complaining about it.

“I enjoy the financial benefits that come with being the other woman, I have never worked a day in my life and “my husband” provides me and our children with everything we need.” Small House

“Sex with someone who isn’t my boyfriend every once in a while is a thrilling experience, you know what they say about variety being the spice of life.” The SexAHolic

“There is a sense of adventure, things done in secret give me an adrenaline rush and I got hooked to it I simply can’t stop.” The Side Chic

“I don’t have to worry about attending funerals, washing his clothes, cooking for him, I get to see him at his best and get to spend quality time with him.” The Cougar

“I get my rent paid, my child taken care of, endless outings, someone to sponsor my drinking habit and never having to worry about how I am going to put food on the table, that’s his job!” The Alcoholic

“Since we don’t see each other often when I do see him there is no time for fighting, I always look forward to seeing him.” Miss No Pressure

“I have been lied to and deceived one too many times, it is better to be with a married guy who won’t make empty promises to me.” Miss Content

“I have my own money, I can take care of myself but I don’t have the time for a full on relationship.  I only see him as and when I am free because I have a busy schedule so being the other woman works for me.” Miss Independent 

Relationships are complicated if you let them be, but from my experience being the other woman never ends well.  It seems for the women above it is working to their advantage and they are happy.  I say, life is too short so one must do whatever makes them happy as long as it gives them sleep at night.

What’s your take on the “other woman”?  I am happy to read on both negative and possibly positive things you have to say about her in the comments section below.

©MaKupsy 2017

5 Blogs That Make Me Happy

One of the many lessons that I have learnt in the past 3 years of blogging is that it’s important to read work written by other bloggers.  Not only does it let you view things differently, it sometimes puts a smile on your face when you are having a bad day.  The following blogs are my go to sites when I need that extra dose of feel good hormones.

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Image from Pinterest
  1. missfelistas.wordpress.com

Felistas has not been blogging for a while but this does not stop me from occasionally browsing through her site.  If you want to read something random then this is the place to go to.  There is always some drama going on there and best of all something to give me a good laugh, this woman is talented I kid you not!   My favourite read is the piece she wrote about How NOT To Break Up.  I can relate to Hurricane Katrina, Big Brother Style and with a bang!!  You have the article from here to understand what I am talking about.

2. hararelifestyle.wordpress.com

Tata takes the trophy any day when it comes to getting me deep into my feelings.  Each time I read one of her posts I am left questioning a lot of things.  What I love the most about her blog is that she doesn’t stick to writing in English only but throws in Shona here and there.  There are just some things that don’t sound the same if written in English.  There is a time she wrote about heartbreak and with each single word she wrote I could relate.  Sex is a real enemy of progress when you are trying to figure out which direction your relationship is going especially during a shaky phase.

Actually, I don’t know who was hurt more, my heart or my vagina.

You can read about it from here and get to read what I’m talking about.  One thing is for sure, she needs to write a book and be quick about it.  The honesty that comes with her blog posts especially where relationships are concerned are priceless!  I used to write about sex but it was never this detailed, do something Tata, I want to go around telling people she is my friend when your book becomes a best seller!

3. businessblundersandbrilliance.com

Would you believe me if I told you that I only discovered this site last week.  Best thing ever!  As you already know I am working hard on building my Fitness Bae  brand and I am always on the lookout for any and everything that will help me work towards making it a success.  My attention was grabbed by the blog post titled 3 Start Up Lessons From Prostitutes.

You are a startup, you carry your business with you everywhere!

What I took from this article is something I already practice but for the sake of emphasis I feel everyone who is an entrepreneur needs to do themselves a favour and follow this blog because it is gold!  Archie talks about how you should talk about your business to any and everyone.  You have to stop feeling shy and make noise about your business if you want people to pay attention.  Be your own hype man(woman).

4. hermajestyexplored.wordpress.com

Books, books and more books!  I am one of those people who love to read.  I have concluded that reading and writing go hand in hand, you can’t be a writer if you don’t read!  I am very old school when it comes to reading and I love me a hard copy.  I want to see, touch and feel my book and you know I got very excited when I realised that one of my favourite bloggers also likes reading.  Her post left a smile on my face especially the fact that she loves to read African Literature.  I don’t remember the last time I read a book that I did not want to put down.  Both Half of a Yellow Sun and Americanah did this too me, the feeling was priceless! I love this blog because there is always something new and different to read on, she might not be a regular blogger but when she does make time she goes all out.

5. tetehumba.wordpress.com

I am always there for the photographs.  Have you seen her contagious smile?  Whenever I am feeling down or uninspired just a few minutes on her site leave me smiling right back at her pictures.  Kumbi is a DIY (Do It Yourself) blogger and I have plans of asking her to make some pretty hair bands for me once my hair is thick and on the road to being a full grown afro!  She recently had a beautiful photo shoot session and you can check it out on this link.

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Positive Vibes Only 🙂

I hope you all had a restful weekend and you are ready for a brand new week that is filled with nothing but promise of beautiful things.

Pray tell…which blogs make you happy?

©MaKupsy 2017

Children Need Outdoor Play Too!

I realised last weekend that the only activity I manage to do with Miss Kupsy when I go home for the weekend in Marondera is go and grab a bite.  We usually settle for pizza and icecream because that is the ONLY take out place in the whole town.  When I bring her to Harare that is a completely different case because the options of things to do are countless.

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Image from Google

However, today my main concern is the lack of outdoor play areas for children in my hometown.  When I was growing up there was a functional swimming pool, a video game centre, a movie house, a tennis court, a basketball court and a park which actually had swings, slides the works!  Ask me what has happened to these play areas?  Well, the swimming pool since stopped working years ago, the video game centre is not used for that anymore, I am still to find out what is going on there, the movie house was turned into a bar, the tennis court now has people setting up stalls to sell second hand clothes, the basketball court is being used as an area to line laundry and the park… oh well; just another dump in town with no swings at all and a lot of litter.

It annoys me that whoever is responsible for town planning does not take the children in the community into consideration.  Where in the world are they supposed to play?  I mean, they can’t possibly stay indoors all day long, or play on the streets or around their house till kingdom come.  They obviously get tired just like everyone else and need a break and need to socialise with children their age.  And if you ask me this should be something that can be done without having to fork out a lot of money if any at all.  Imagine if all they are going to be exposed to is eating unhealthy take out?  I can just picture a whole bunch of adults suffering for weight issues in the near future…

The following points are (based on Wardle, 1996-2003) describe the main reasons why outdoor play is critical for the healthy development of young children.  I took a few points from the article.

Physical Exercise Children need to develop large motor and small motor skills and cardiovascular endurance.

Enjoyment of the Outdoors Outdoor play is one of the things that characterize childhood. And as Lord Nuffield once said, the best preparation for adulthood is to have a full and enjoyable childhood.

Learning about the World Outdoor play enables young children to learn lots and lots and lots of things about the world. How does ice feel and sound? Can sticks stand up in sand? How do plants grow? How does mud feel?

Learning about Self and the Environment To learn about their own physical and emotional capabilities, children must push their limits. Health Everyone who works with young children in early childhood programs and schools knows how quickly bacteria and viruses spread in these environments. One way to reduce the spread of infection is through lots and lots of fresh air.

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Definitely NOT in Marondera

Then you wonder why I am thoroughly upset with Marondera Town Council?  Do you see all those benefits of outdoor fun for children? It seems those in the powers that be do not have children as a part of their programme because if they did surely there would be at least ONE play area where children can just have a grand time.

Miss Kupsy loves the outdoors and I feel bad that the only open space she has to play is at home.  I hope someone addresses this  issue and something is done about it.  When I think back to my own childhood, some of their fondest memories are of outdoor places and activities I got up to (I will never forget the first time I fell off a tree trying to climb to the top) I hope Miss Kupsy and all the other children in the community do not get deprived of that opportunity. All children have the right to basic childhood needs…jumping, running, climbing, swinging, racing, yelling, rolling, hiding, and making a big mess,it is what childhood is all about!

©MaKupsy 2017

Desperate Housewives

When everyone was all excited about the television series Desperate Housewives I joined in but only got to watch the first two seasons because I never really had time to sit down and watch it.  A few weeks ago my friend brought me back to the series and gave me the whole 8 seasons of it and I have been hooked ever since.  I am currently watching Season 6 and the first episode left me feeling a lot of different things.  Here’s the thing.

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Image from Google

If you go back to season 5 Mike had moved in with Catherine and they seemed happy.  Well, Catherine mostly did because she hadn’t been in a relationship in a while and was happy to finally have someone in her life.  Mike seemed distant and still in love with his ex wife Susan. (But apparently they had both “moved on”) Catherine obviously didn’t see that Mike wasn’t head over heels for her because she was in a love bubble of her own.  I think it was brave of Catherine to ask Mike if he was ever going to marry her because Mike told her the truth that he didn’t know.  And you know that for most women we choose to not pay attention to what a man says.  He actually told her the truth but we always find a way of hoping somehow he will change his mind because we are just programmed like that I guess.  The other issue I have with Mike is that he will go above and beyond for Susan just to make her happy but clearly won’t do much for Catherine.  I can safely say Catherine gets half baked love from Mike but Susan on the other hand…There are real life cases where you date a guy and he treats you like crap but then dates the next woman and treats her like a queen and you wonder what the fuck is that all about?  So then;the series continues and a whole lot of things happen but this is the part that really got to me when I watched episode one of season 6.

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Mike just went on to marry Susan and left Catherine out in the cold.  Okay fine, maybe Catherine made a not so wise decision by hooking up with someone she knew still had unresolved issues but give her a break, you can’t exactly choose who you fall in love with, or can you?  Why does Susan always get what she wants though?  That again is not fair!  I was really sad on Catherine’s behalf.  How do women end up in situations like this though?  How do we just feel the need to fall for the emotionally unavailable guy?  Do we not see the signs?  And as for Mike, how do you just drop Catherine like a hot potato and get back to your ex wife (Susand) and forget about all the promises you made to Catherine?  Didn’t she at least mean something to you?  Does this mean she doesn’t have feelings too or she should just get over it and move on.  Mind you she stays right across the street and will get to witness everything the pair gets up to.  Man, the world is a cold ass place…

I should clearly stop over analysing things, it’s just a series!!

©MaKupsy 2017