Don’t Follow Your Heart!

If you ask me, when it comes to love, I don’t learn, AT ALL!  I see things in black and white but I choose to add some colour to spice things up.  I’m beginning to believe I thrive on drama.  Let me tell you something that happened to me many moons ago; I look back now and simply shake my head but when it happened my poor heart was going through a lot of pain.

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Image from Google

You already know the narrative, boy meets girl, both fall helplessly in love and start dating.  The universe always chooses to play a joke on me and has the “love of my life” move out of the country and I’m left behind with a whole sack full of feelings.  However, this time around there seemed to be hope.  Thanks to technology we were in constant communication and even had the same Display Picture on WhatsApp.  Stuff like that makes me feel all shades of mushy inside.  I like whoever is dating me to show me off, I love it!

There was only one problem.  My current flame still had pictures of his ex on his Facebook profile.  Initially I pretended that it didn’t bother me but eventually I communicated that I wasn’t comfortable with having to see her on his profile, he could hide his albums no problem but having them in my face felt offensive.  How I always end up with partners who still have ex issues beats me?

The flame told me that his ex was going to be in the country for some work related thing and she might pass through to see him.  It was at that point that all hell broke loose.  In my head I thought  why in the world would your ex travel halfway across the continent to probably see you at some point.  Why are you still talking to your ex, why are you even telling me about this??!!!  I felt so much confusion I couldn’t focus on anything for days to come.  After telling my friend what was going on she sent me a message and said, “I told you that woman was never an ex she has always been there it was just the distance that had separated them.” 

I asked him what was going on and I was told that she was still his friend and I was being crazy.  I recall him telling me I was being dramatic.  Me, dramatic for saying what I was seeing with my own eyes!  I was drinking on a Monday after work or any given day actually.  You see, alcohol is my coping mechanism.  I was sending voice notes and never ending messages to my flame asking why he chose to pursue me if he knew he still had unfinished business with his ex.  I was listening to all our favourite songs and crying buckets, I had headaches every single morning.  I was a hot mess!

After a few weeks I told myself I was going to delete his number, all our music playlists and all our photographs together and let go.  I said my peace and walked away from the most intense emotional place I had ever found myself in.  I loved him so much but I wasn’t going to risk getting a broken heart over someone who obviously lied to me from the get go.

Months later I went to check his Facebook account.  The so called “ex” was there alright, he went on to get a tattoo with her name…  Sigh.

I need to do better.  I need to be better.  I don’t want the kind of love that sets my soul on fire.  I’ve been in that kind of love, it does nothing but bring me pain and disappointment.  I want a love that is calm, certain and doesn’t give me sleepless nights.  I know things will not always be perfect but for the most part the relationship should maintain my sanity!  Anyone can tell you that they love you, they’re just three little words after all; what matters is what they want to do about this love they claim to have for you.  The plan is to write a beautiful love story in 2018 despite all the disasters I’ve been through in the past, it will happen, when the time is right, this much I know.

I have more love gone wrong blog posts for you to enjoy, at this rate I may as well move around with a gown to showcase my Masters In Failed Relationships;

How To Lose A Great Guy

Butterfly

The Rebound Guy

Catching Feelings

What are some of the things you have done in the name of love?  I can’t be the only one doing relationships wrong, let’s talk about this and have a good laugh at ourselves.

©MaKupsy 2018

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Fitness Bae : Behind The Name

I rejoined Facebook last year after deleting my account nearly 6 years ago.  The only reason I got back was because the social media programme I was studying recommended that Facebook was a highly effective tool to get your blogs to spread like wild fire.  I can confirm that it’s true.

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Shanee reached out to me a few months ago and told me about her Facebook Page.  I’m not a fan of groups but after we had a little chat I decided to check her page out and I was not disappointed.  It’s highly interactive and she asks the uncomfortable questions that our Zimbabwean society tends to sweep under the carpet.  If you are on Facebook and would like a space to have a good laugh and get down to some serious issues then be sure to follow her.  Please note that some of her posts are in Shona so Google Translate is your friend.  You can follow her from here.

Shanee sent me a few questions related to fitness a while back and my answers are below:

Why do you do what you do?

I love to exercise, it’s my happy place.  It took me out of a very dark phase of my life to a brighter and more purpose driven one.  In the past I struggled with being overweight and the emotional and mental baggage that comes with it.  What started as a journey to lose weight has turned into a journey to gain life;  to find meaning. Fitness has made me grow into a strong and confident woman!

What are the pros and cons of exercising?

There are countless pros to exercising but my favourite one is the “feel good hormones.”  Each time I exercise I feel happy, refreshed and energetic.  That feeling is priceless.  The other advantage of exercising is that it’s a personal pursuit, you are constantly challenging your mind and body to push boundaries it never thought were possible.

The only real con is that you have do it.  I have been on this journey for three years now and there’s no stopping me.  It’s a lifetime thing.  I actually have to stop myself from oversharing my running addiction on Facebook incase my friends unfriend me.   Exercising is a deliberate act that involves making some tough choices every single day.

What’s the best age to start exercising?

Any and all ages. It’s obviously easier for younger people because the condition of your body plays a part.  I have a daughter who is 5 years old and she loves to imitate almost everything I do, exercise included and even though she doesn’t realise it but exercise has become a part of her daily life.

How much does it cost?

It depends on how you choose to approach it. It can cost next to nothing to look up a few exercise plans and start working out.  I am your go to person here; I host challenges each month(free) on my Facebook Page.  You can also opt to join a gym and that will cost you anything ranging from $40 to $120.

The alternative that I offer is a customised weight loss plan that costs as little as $20 a month.  This is a plan designed to fit into your life and achieve the body you deserve!

Where do you exercise?

The comfort of  my home, the open road or even in a park. The Fitness In The Park team will be hosting Harare ParkRuns starting from the 2nd of September and they will bring a great new element for those who need some motivation to get up and do something!

Who do you exercise with?

Fitnesss Bae of course!  You should join the movement too and come #RunWithFitnessBae

Why is it important for both men and women to exercise?

Fitness is for every one. A healthy body performs better for longer. It can help prevent some major health problems (type 2 diabetes and heart trouble, hypertension) or even manage existing ones.  Exercise also helps better your performance at sex.  Imagine how strong your body will get when you do full body exercises, whichever position you choose to try, you know you will be able to hold it the entire time.

What are other varieties of exercises do you do besides running?

There are many fitness programs and types like running, cycling, swimming, Zumba which all have great weight-loss benefits.  There are also dietary programs. I use a combination of both fitness and diet to achieve my weight-loss and weight management results.

Any advice for those starting out on their fitness journey?

Make small deliberate changes into your life and you will soon see the results.  You can start with cutting down your food portions, aiming for 5 000 steps a day, drinking a certain amount of water each day; whatever small change you make will gradually add up.  You don’t need anything fancy to get started, just a positive attitude.  It will go a long way.

Stay logged onto my Health and Fitness Journey Series Episode 10 will be live on Tuesday at 9:00am.  It will be the last episode of Season 1.

Fitness Bae®

 

 

 

 

Giveaway : Heels

Good morning my lovings, I hope you are all well.

Before my fitness journey I was addicted to wearing heels. Years later I hardly ever wear heels if anything I am always on the lookout for comfortable running shoes. I am giving away one of my favourite heels (preloved) and for you to win you simply have to:

1. Tell me why you should win the pair of shoes?
2. Tell me the name of the hash tag I own.
3. Add your favourite picture to your post.

The person with the most likes wins!!!

Closing date for the give away is Sunday 27 May 2017 so get sharing you might just make someone’s day.

P.S The shoes are size 6 so if you aren’t a size 6 you can always win them for a friend or your girlfriend☺️☺️

Like my Facebook Page to take part.

Fitness Bae®

Fitness In The Park!

Let’s be honest, gym membership is expensive.  With subscriptions ranging from $50 to $150 per month it’s no wonder most people don’t hit the gym. I mean, how many of us can afford those prices, definitely not me!  If you have been following my health and fitness journey on social media you will already know that I managed to lose 10kgs in a year through eating right and without attending a single gym session.  This is what this meet up in the park is going to be all about, helping you achieve your fitness goals without breaking a budget.

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The event is open to everyone and I am encouraging you to come through no matter your fitness levels.  Remember we are always learning new things everyday and this will be a platform to share experiences and map a way forward for your fitness journey.

For more information on the event you can call or WhatsApp the numbers on the flyer.  You can also check out my Fitness Blog for different articles on health and fitness over here.  Alternatively you can Like my Facebook page to join a team that is seriously enthusiastic about fitness.

This the first of many events to come and I hope to see you there!

MaKupsy© 2017

#UrsulaChallenge

I have to be honest with you, when I initially started working out I never in my wildest dreams thought that it would inspire so many people around me.  It has been and continues to be an interesting fitness journey.  I created a WhatsApp group with amazing individuals and everyday we push each other do to better than we did the day before.  Within the group there are Fitness Instructors, Physiotherapists, Lawyers, IT Personnel, Secretaries, University Students, Bloggers…tell you what, the list is endless and the group is diverse.

The great thing about it is thanks to technology we don’t have to be all in one place to run, just a running application on your mobile device and you are good to go.  There are runners from the UK, Algeria, Malawi, Namibia, South Africa,Zambia, Zimbabwe.  Minus running we get to learn different languages, cultures and foods.  Okay, I will have to expand on this on a different day, for now let  me talk about the #UrsulaChallenge

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Flyer by @KingKGC (Twitter)

The last challenge we had, Taku won hands down.  We have a rule that whoever wins the challenge is the one who will choose what the next challenge will entail.  I decided to have a little twist to it because I realised that to keep the motivation alive runners who are improving need to get some form of recognition as well and so Ursula was the lucky runner to get chosen. She has been running with the team since October and she has outdid herself, even running after a long day when all she wanted to do was sleep.

There are a few additions to her challenge which are:

  • Participants are to weigh in on Monday morning or Sunday evening and have their weight recorded.

You are encouraged to weigh in at the same time you weighed yourself at the beginning of the challenge and to use the same scale.

The one who loses the most weight during this weeks challenge gets 15 bonus points.

P.S The weight loss is for those who have it as their goal to lose weight, if not please do not worry yourself with the weigh in.

  • There will be a cook off on the Rest Day of the challenge.  The participant who sends through a plate that has healthy  food options, is well presented and appealing to the eye will get 5 bonus points.

I hope you will take part in this challenge, trust me, if you are a fitness enthusiast you will completely enjoy it and probably come back for more.  All the best in the upcoming challenge team, and may the best runner win!

#UrsulaChallenge #RunWithFitnessBae

P.S We always use Nike+(read as being resistant to change) for the challenges but this time the rules are more flexible and participants can use Strava, Cardio Trainer, Adidas and NRC.

Share. Like. Join.

©MaKupsy 2016

#NatalieChallenge

Good morning #TeamFitness we have a big week ahead of us. Here are the Rules for the upcoming #NatalieChallenge.  The challenge has started today and we already have a handful of runners who have clocked in today’s distance.  The WhatsApp group has grown and it now has 40 members.  If you would like to read on the previous challenge please click on this here.

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As you already know we will be running predetermined distances for 5 days;

Monday 4km
Tuesday 4.5km
Wednesday 5km
Thursday 5.5km
Friday 6 km

Here is how we will be scoring the challenge to determine a winner.

1. Points
We will use a simple points system based on how you place in a day. Depending on the number of runners. Say if we have 20 runners; 1st place gets 20 points, 2nd place gets 19 and so on until 20th place who gets 1 point. If you do not run you will be awarded 0 points.

As the days progress points will be added in a log system and most points is awarded 1st place and so on.

2. Bonus points
Over the course of the challenge bonus points will be awarded as follows;

3. Completion bonus
5 points will be awarded for completing the challenge (5 days) to everyone who does.

4. Improvement bonus
5 points will be awarded to the 3 individuals with the most improved paces measured as the biggest difference between your first day pace (min/km) versus your fastest pace thereafter.

5. Continuous Improvement bonus
10 points will be awarded to any individual who improves their pace on each day. As in they go faster everyday for days 2, 3, 4 & 5.

6. Daily climber
From day 2 to 5, the individual with the biggest climb measured as difference between previous day ranking and current day ranking (overall points log) will be awarded 3 bonus points. Where there is a tie all individuals receive 3 bonus points.

7. #RunWithFitnessBae Bonus
Any individual who posts their run on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter using the hashtags #RunWithFitnessBae, #NatalieChallenge and #FitnessBae earns one extra point per day.

8. Fast Finisher bonus
If your last km in a particular run is your fastest km as measured by pace min/km, you are awarded an additional bonus point. One per person per day.

Bonus points will carry the same weight as ordinary points.

Penalties and disqualification
There will be NO penalties leveled on runners nor will people be disqualified or withdraw. Once you’re in you’re in.

Those are your rules everyone. Remember to have fun!

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P.S. Please support the #RunWithFitnessBae on Thunderclap it won’t take a minute of your time and no you don’t have to run as well.  It’s just a way of spreading the word for the Running Challenge.

Please also like my Fitness page on Facebook.

Get fit or die trying…

©MaKupsy 2016

Friendship

Friendships usually start because of common ground, and for Tanya and I, pregnancy brought us together.  I noticed we had a mutual friend on Facebook and decided to add her to my friend’s list.  It’s good to note that some good comes out of these social networks right?  We were both in our third trimester and both going through all the changes that come with pregnancy.  I gave birth first and told her all the traumatising things I went through during labour (and added a bit of lies here and there for dramatic effect);  and nearly a month later she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, who is now my son-in-law to be because he is just too cute.

We kept in touch over the phone mostly and only got to meet in person a year later.  We have been very good friends ever since.  She is like a sister to me.  We have our fair share of fights, where we can go months on end sulking for no reason.  I have concluded that it must be a “last born syndrome” that we both suffer from so we both come with pride issues.  Times we are not talking and being childish, I miss her terribly.  When we do get back in touch, it’s like we never stopped talking at all.

I have never had a friend who simply does not stop chatting.  We are on Whatsapp from 5am till 10pm each and every day and we never run out of things to say. We share almost everything, from tips on how to raise our children better, goals and aspirations, new recipes to try out, sex stories, gossip in small doses(do you really believe this part?) and almost everything else that women who are super close share.  Even on days I am not in chat mode I will ignore everyone else and chat with her instead because we are just a crazy pair.  She is a one in a million character and if you are not used to her you would think this little missy has issues.  Oh, by the way, she is really small but has a big mouth it is simply unbelievable!!

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Tanya

She is one of the few people who are close and dear to me because with her I can be myself and not worry about being judged or ridiculed.  We are open and honest with each other and because of her some days I have pushed myself when all I wanted to do was chill out and do nothing.  I wrote this post to let her know that I am glad that she is in my life and that no matter what’s going on between us, be it on the “mute” days or on the days we are really getting along she is and always will be the one friend I am glad I have and will always cherish.   Through her I have learnt to pursue my dreams, be more giving and caring, to realise that everyone including myself deserve nothing but the best.  Thank you for being a great friend Tanya, you are loved from the moon and back.

MaKupsy