Take Time To Unpack

School days are the best days of your life?  I think not!  I remember the year, 1993 it was sometime before Christmas.  My parents told me that I could write up a list of friends I would invite over for a party and I was delighted.  I used to have a birthday celebration each year but it was always with my siblings and hardly ever with my friends so you can imagine the excitement.  A few days later I was informed that we were going to Marondera and I didn’t read much into it.  My grandmother stayed there and we visited her often so for me it was just another trip to see Gogo(grandmother).  I was wrong, we were moving and no one even cared to tell me.

It was only when we arrived in Marondera and we didn’t go to Gogo’s place that I realised that something was amiss.  I was shown our new home and what was going to be my new bedroom and I was not amused.  You see, when we were in Chinhoyi the house we stayed in was tripple the size of the one I saw before my eyes.  The neighbourhood was completely different, I knew no one except my cousins who stayed I didn’t even know where because we met when we all went to Gogo’s place.  I was devastated.  I actually cried buckets and told my parents I wanted to go back to Chinhoyi and be with my friends, my school and everything that I was familiar with.  Mothers back then didn’t take tantrums lightly and my mother would whoop my ass for being dramatic.  I cried myself to sleep so many nights, I missed my friends.  I missed home.

I had to attend a new school and as you can imagine I felt like an outsider.  Making friends was a real mission.  I loved sport, I could swim and play tennis but I didn’t make it to the team because the school already had their set of students they had already “chosen”.  I remember taking up hockey instead and I struck some luck there and ended up being in the team.  Even after trying to make friends through sport people didn’t seem to like me.  I was bullied and secluded.  The one time all the girls in my class called for a meeting and sat me down.  I don’t remember what it was about but I remember walking home in tears and wishing I would either go back to Chinhoyi or die.  Children can be really cruel and to date I don’t understand why they treated me that way.

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Image from Google

At home my father never wanted me to leave the house.  I was always under lock and key.  The only time I was allowed to play outside the gate was when I went out to ride my bicycle.  That was one of my favourite things to do.  A few weeks after we moved my bicycle was stolen and I was left with nothing else to do with my time.  Eventually I was allowed to go and play with children my age but only till a certain time of day then it was back to being under lock and key.

I still have memories of having to sit outside during break time by myself because the other girls were “punishing me”.  Was it because they had already established who their friends were and I was messing up things for them by being the newbie?  Was it because I loved to take part in sporting activities?  Was it because I didn’t know anything about the town?  I had and still have so many questions because I can’t imagine why people would have such a strong feeling of dislike of someone they really didn’t know.

I never looked forward to going to school.  I hated every minute of it.  I remember telling my parents about what was happening but they brushed it off.  There were a lot of incidents that happened that I won’t dwell on because as it is I am typing this and crying at the same time, the wounds are resurfacing all over again!  I grew up telling myself that once I am done with school I am never coming back to Marondera if it’s the last thing I do.  I hate that place, it has so many unpleasant memories.  Each time I travel and I start feeling home sick it’s not Marondera I will be thinking of, I will be thinking of my home here in Harare.  It was only yesterday that it dawned on me that this is the reason I never enjoy my visits to Marondera, the place haunts me…

 

©MaKupsy 2016

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I Am NOT Broody

Miss Kupsy has been on my case for a baby sister since last year in January.  I blame her friends.  No actually, I blame the mothers.  They are busy manufacturing little people and putting my little girl under unnecessary pressure.  She now feels lonely because her friends have playmates and she is all alone.

 

I have a million reasons why I don’t want to have another baby yet though and some of the reasons may sound petty but are a really big deal for me.  For one, I don’t have a car and trust me moving about with a child with public transport is a real nightmare and I would not want to go through that with two children!  Until I buy myself a car having another baby is out of the question.  I once wrote about not wanting to have another baby but I guess time does change your mind right; you can read more of my reasons from here.

However; I never thought about procreating until recently when I realised I am all she has.  If I was to drop dead today who would be there for her.  Yes, my family is there but what about a sibling she can call on when life happens?  I am not getting any younger and it would be ideal to have her and her sibling with a reasonable age gap so that at least that would keep them close.  (I can only hope)  

After typing this out I realised that maybe just maybe I don’t want to have another baby after all.  I relived my labour experience and it’s a done deal. It’s not happening.  I really am not broody for real and I was just enjoying the idea of Miss Kupsy having a playmate but I am not willing to do it, no thank you.  Somehow I thought if I wrote it down I would convince myself to try for another one but it didn’t work. She will be fine, I am going to make a lot of money and make sure she has a fulfilling life she will never want for a sibling.  Labour is not a fun place to be!  What was I even smoking??

©MaKupsy 2017

 

 

My (Ex) Maid Has Got Some Freaking Nerve!!!

Asi cei musinga dzwisie ndakambo zviita here asi ipo ndinouya munondipawo 600 dolloras.

Let me translate this for my non Shona and short hand from who knows where readers.  That message reads:

But why do you not understand, has this happened before?  Do you give me $600 when I come?

First of all, I HATE DOING HOUSEWORK, especially the laundry bit.  It’s not that I can’t do it, I can, very much so but why should I when someone else can do it for me?  I vowed that 2015 going forward I would not involve myself in any house chores especially laundry and ironing.  In the past I have had this maid come every other month but this year she was coming twice a month at most since the beginning of the year.  I have known her for two years now and we had a perfect thing going on because her cleaning skills are exceptional.  So where lies the problem you might ask?

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Let me break it down…

Last week I asked her to come through to clean up my apartment and do the laundry and ironing.  She charges between $10  to $15 or more depending on how much laundry there needs to be done.  We agreed on a figure and she came through.  Unfortunately we had experienced a power fault the previous night so there was no electricity for her to do the ironing.  Before I left I had informed her that in case the electricity issue didn’t get sorted out we would have to make plan B and she suggested that she would show up on Sunday morning to get the ironing done.  Fair enough, I paid her before leaving the house (BIGGEST MISTAKE EVER!!)  I got home to a clean house as always, laundry nicely done but because there was obviously no electricity the ironing wasn’t done.  Come Sunday morning I sent her a message asking her what time she would show up to which she instantly replied telling me her mother was unwell.  Okay, these things happen, I told her it was okay and wished her mother a speedy recovery.  She suggested she would come the following day and guess what…she did a no show on me.  Me being me, I called to ask why she didn’t show up and she told me she wasn’t feeling well.  (This is when I realised I had been played).   It was only yesterday after I had been patient that I finally decided to call her and ask what was going on and she insisted she wasn’t feeling okay.

NEWSFLASH!! This same “I’m not feeling well maid” called my friend (who I referred her to) to tell her that she would be coming to work on Saturday.  Like the freaking nerve!!  That’s what really annoyed the fuck out of me.  Like really, I have been calling and texting this woman and she has the nerve to lie to me and this is after I have paid her for a complete job.  Man I was livid yesterday!! I was seeing red!  WHO DOES THAT??  I sent her a message telling her that I felt betrayed and for someone I had trusted for over two years she really did a number on me and that’s when her message with all it’s typos and ridiculousness came in.

This maid has some nerve I kid you not!  After all the little favours I have done for her and the people I have referred to her for work this is the thanks she gives me?  The number of times in the past she has texted me to ask if I needed her to come through and I have agreed just so that she can make an extra buck?   And now she tells me it’s not as if I give her $600??  She’s got jokes I tell you!!

Most maids are the same if you ask me.  They are full of shit.  They don’t want you being nice and understanding because they will just take your niceness for weakness.  I think I should start taking classes from my oldest sister.  She has no mercy when it comes to her house help.  She will tell them only one meal all day and give them a whole set of rules.  They always stay longer and don’t give her any headaches.  And here I am with my “You can fix yourself breakfast and make Sadza and whatever tickles your fancy for lunch” and I get fucked in the ass!  Totally disappointed in her and totally pissed off too!!

You would think I don’t already have any other things to worry about now I have to make a plan to get someone to come and do my ironing tomorrow!

Lessons learnt:

  1. Do not pay her the full amount until she has finished doing the work.
  2. Do not treat her like your friend.
  3. Do not use the same maid for too long, she will walk all over you!
  4. I am clearly too nice I should up my game and just play strict.

MaKupsy