Your Love Still Haunts Me

I met you 13 years ago but your love still haunts me.  I can’t believe I’ve gone through life comparing everyone I’ve come across with you.  It’s a bad thing to do, I know this too well; but I can’t help it.  You loved me unconditionally.  I never had to wonder how you felt about me because I felt it inside me, your love was true.

Day 2 #SheHeals MaKupsy.jpg

Will I ever meet someone who will treat me the way you did?  Someone who will be proud to have me in his life the way you did?  Someone who introduced me to his parents, aunts, sister and brother without having to ask.  Someone who gave me the keys to his house and I was free to come and go as I please.  Someone who my parents loved and adored after they asked to meet you.  Someone who never made me want for anything?

On days like today I always kick myself for walking away.  “I’m still too young, I need to discover myself.”  That’s what I told you when I gave you back the engagement ring you had bought for me.  If only I knew that we could have discovered the world together, grown together, written our happy ever after together, gone through all the surprises life throws at you together…but here I am filled with nothing but regret.

However, I still have hope; I believe that if true love could find you before, it will find you once more.  For now I have days I’m stuck in the past wondering if I will ever feel safe the way I did when I was with you.  I was loved.

©MaKupsy 2018


10 Reasons I Crush On Yemi Alade

I have a major woman crush on  Yemi Alade!  I’ve tried to hide it for a couple of weeks now but I can’t help myself anymore, Yemi is going all out to make you notice her whether you listen to Nigerian music or not.  Below are some of my favourite things about her:

  1. Her creativity juices abundantly flow.  She doesn’t restrict herself to singing one genre of music, now that’s creativity!
  2. She is confident, you just have to see her in action to know this.
  3. She is hard working, her videos are not mediocre, you can see a lot of work has been put in.
  4. She is a happy person, if you’re anything like me and stalk her every once in a while you would know this from her photos.
  5. She has a contagious smile.

    Yemi Alade.jpg

    Image from Google

  6. Yemil Alade has the body of a goddess!  Talk about having lady lumps in the right places.  Her thick thighs are definitely saving someones life 🙂
  7. She has her dance moves on lock.  Just watch any of her videos, she isn’t just sitting about looking pretty, she’s putting her back in it!
  8. Her fashion sense is amazing.  Never a dull moment in her wardrobe, think bold and loud colours, she’s wearing them.
  9. Big hair lives here.  She goes all out with different hairstyles mainly natural hair looks and occasionally something not so natural, either way she is always rocking it.
  10. The reason why I crush on her the most is that she sings in her own language.  I have no idea what she will be singing the greater part of the time but the rhythm always gets me excited.

This is my favourite Yemi Alade video. She went out and went straight into Salsa!  Now that ladies and gentleman is what I call breaking musical barriers.  I can never get enough of this woman, she’s definitely won my heart…musically that is 🙂

What’s your favourite song by Yemi Alade?

©MaKupsy 2017

Friends Are Like Breasts

“Friends are like breasts, you’ve got big ones, small ones, real ones, and fake ones.”

I’m that one person who has very few friends.  I can safely say I have just 5 close friends and it’s a great feeling; I have way less drama in my life thanks to that.  These friends are in trouble though, we share the most random life experiences and I promise you if anyone went  Over the years I have lost and found new friends at different phases of my life but one thing stands true, all of my friendships have come with both positive and negative lessons which I will write about at a later time.  Today let me share my thoughts on how you can keep the sparkle in your friendship.


Shami & MaKupsy 🙂


Friendships just like relationships take a lot of work.  Thankfully technology has made life easier for everyone and most people have access to WhatsApp, Skype, phone calls, social media platforms, think Facebook; there really is no excuse not to stay in touch.  If you plan on staying friends for a while you have to make sure you take regular communication seriously.

Spending Time Together

Yes ladies, you know how we always complain about that guy who only texts but never makes an effort to meet up and see you on a face to face date?  No prize for guessing that the same thing applies to friendship!  Make an effort to meet up in person as often as you can to do activities you both like.  I know one of my close friends has a “no phones policy” when we go out on dates, she believes it’s important to give each other 110% attention when we finally get to spend time together because cellphones are generally disruptive and I now completely agree!


There is a huge difference between catching up and suffocating your friend.  Don’t be that friend who doesn’t understand the art of leaving someone alone with their thoughts.  It’s perfectly fine to go a day or two without talking to a close friend, life is happening to all of us and sometimes spending an entire day chatting away about nothing is not the most productive thing to do.  It’s welcome on most days but certainly not on all days.  If you are this person, please give your friend some space.


I would have said gifts but everyone’s language of love is different.  I remember the one time I was crazy in love about shoes and my best friend Tanya, who happens to be all the way in South Africa got me a pair of designer heels for my birthday.  I was in tears of joy the entire day thinking of how she planned for weeks to get the shoes to me on my birthday without ever showing a hint of what she was up to.  She knows my language of love is all things pretty if that’s even a language but she gets me.  You know what your friend values the most, whatever it is, make an effort to go out of your way and get it done for them.  Here’s a free idea, get someone to clean their house and do their laundry and iron it so that they come back home they get back to a sparkling clean house!

*P.S. Surprise money is also nice*


If your friend is always in agreement and never questions your choices or decisions is that even a friend?  At some point you will mess up and you will need someone to hand it out to you in black and white, no sugar coating, no playing nice; just the hard truth.  They will also give you advice on how best to deal with a situation because criticism without a way forward is pointless.  When your friend is losing the plot be the one to remind them, good friends look out for each other.

Grow Together

Grow in all aspects.  Physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  What’s the point of being friends if you remain exactly the same?  Most of my friends are book worms, they are always studying for some programme of sort and it’s only natural that it rubs onto me.  The last time I was on a coffee date with Chenge she encouraged me to take up an online course which I delayed on taking any action on until a few weeks ago.  You see, our lunch dates are productive after all!

These are my top tips on how to keep the spice in your friendship.  I know there are a lot more of where those came from but I would like to hear from you.  What do you do to maintain the friendship connections in your life?  I’ve observed that men don’t seem to do a lot of work to maintain their friendships.  How do you men do it?  Please share your secrets!

That said, when it comes to the sort of breast friend I am, I’m right up there with the “real breasts, have you seen the size of my breasts?! *insert forever laughing emoji here*

©MaKupsy 2017






Sex On The First Date

First dates are designed to produce a number of relationship outcomes. (e.g. sexual partner, friendship, short-term romantic relationship, or life partnership.) – Wikipedia

I don’t know about you but I know that sex is a pretty enjoyable experience.  Without it the world would probably be one very boring place!  A lot of people are not comfortable talking about sex, which is very much okay because we are different but unfortunately for you I love to go on and on about it as and when.  Today I want to share my thoughts on having sex on the first date.  It comes with a lot of controversy of course but look, dating as described above is a process that yields different outcomes so having sex or not largely depends on the individuals involved.


Image From Pinterest


First things first, you have to decide if you want to establish why you want to date.  With that out of the way your first date won’t be too awkward.  Below are some of the reasons why you should totally have sex on the first date.

  • Life is short!  Do you have any idea how you can go for weeks, months or even years without getting laid and here you are trying to deprive your lady bits of such pleasures?
  • If the chemistry is there there’s really no need to hold out on him, be a go getter!  Let’s just dive straight into dessert, who has time for the main meal, right?
  • You are confident that this is what you really want and you won’t start regretting it afterwards.
  • The earlier you have sex the better to save yourself time.  You might choose to wait for months only to be disappointed that time you have already caught feelings and now you end up staying with that person for all the wrong reasons!
  • Whatever you do just make sure you get yourself a shattering orgasm and not leave yourself unsatisfied.  Do you have any idea how lovely those sex hormones feel, not forgetting the after sex glow, you will be smiling for days to come.

However, I do understand that a lot of people, women especially have some reservations when it comes to having sex on the first date.  These are some of the reasons why having sex on the first date might not be a very bright idea.

  • You probably don’t know enough about someone to let them into such an intimate part of your life.  Are you ready to deal with the demons that come with them?
  • Your partner might judge you for being too forward.
  • Say goodbye to your judgement.  Once you get some good dicking you can kiss thinking straight goodbye.  Most people get attached to someone once they have sex with them and if things happen to go wrong it will be difficult to let go.  Now you are stuck with a complete as*hole but the sex game is out of this world.  Good dick is NOT your friend!

I’ve read a couple of articles that encourage women to wait to have sex with their potential partner for 90 days. Apparently this will determine if someone will stay with you for the long haul.  Truth be told, some people had someone wait for a whole year and they still left!  After all is said and done someone will leave if they want to, whether you have sex with them on the first date or after 90 days.

There’s absolutely no formula to this whole sex on the first date thing.  It can work out for the good or the bad depending on the couple involved.  However, if you do decide to have sex whatever you do ALWAYS practice safe sex.  My thoughts still remain the same on the subject.  I’m too old to die from lust because a, b and c said you should do this.  I will do what I think is right for me because You Only Live Once!

You can check out some of the comments on the subject from one of my favourite Facebook Pages from here.  There is never a dull moment there and you should like and follow and never miss out on daily discussions.

What are your thoughts on sex on the first date or even better, care to share your experience on the subject?

©MaKupsy 2017





10 Quotes That Make Me Happy

Happiness really is a state of mind.  I know this first hand.  Most days I’m a bubble of positive energy and some days well, some days life takes over and I drown in negative energy.  Last week was hard for me, I was facing so many emotional battles that I was convinced I was never going to get out of it.  Thankfully it only lasted a while and I’m back to my happy self.  Below are some of my favourite quotes.

  1. Be fearless in pursuit of what sets your soul on fire.
  2. Some days you just have to bring your own sunshine.
  3. If you are tired learn to rest not quit!
  4. Today will be F.A.B.U.L.O.U.S.
  5. One of the simplest ways to stay happy is to let go of the things that make you sad.
  6. Stress is caused by giving a fu*k
  7. Chin up Queen, or the crown slips.
  8. Being happy never goes out of style.
  9. The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.
  10. Today be the badas* girl you were too lazy to be yesterday!

I love Pinterest, it’s one of my many reliable sources when it comes to getting back on the happy wagon.  You can follow me and check out my board, Positive Energy.

What keeps you going when you are facing trying times?


©MaKupsy 2017

Woman Crush Wednesday : @TeteHumba

I am always on the look out for people who ooze positive energy.  My first Woman Crush Wednesday this year is this beautiful soul; Tete Humba.


Some of the things that fire my soul include being creative and working with my hands; with that I can never go wrong. As long as I am making something, I am happy. It started off as a joke but the more I experimented the more I realised that that was my happy place. From headboards, to DIY beauty products, to wigs, to clothes, shoes, wall décor. I’ll make it all!


Skin Tone

Coconut oil!  I use it to moisturize; in my masks and to remove my makeup. It’s incorporated in everything. But bear in mind I have dry skin so that makes the perfect combo.



Life Lessons 

When it’s a part of God’s plan, it will happen.  The Year 2016 was a very difficult year for me, and life threw its punches of all sorts.  Life tried to get me down but God had His own idea and here I am.


Your Centre?

My family. I cannot imagine life without them. They are my everything.



You can get in touch with Tete Humba on FacebookTwitter and Instagram.  For her hair products you can also find her on Instagram @hairbytete_h and @rtndphotography

Don’t forget the 8th of March is International Women’s Day, celebrate women!!

©MaKupsy 2017



Happiness doesn’t come easy, it’s an everyday task.  From the moment you wake up to the moment you lay your head down to rest you have to choose to be happy.   I’ve tried for so many years to get happiness from other people not knowing that if those people left they would take their happiness with them.  Then there was trying to get fulfillment from material things.  I think trying to find happiness in material things is the worst kind of disappointment.  Imagine spending so much money on a gadget hoping it will miraculously change your life and make you feel happy only for it to be just that, a new gadget in your life and less money in the bank for you; so much for that!

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Years later, happiness comes to me naturally.  Of course I have my bad days, I am only human after all and on a scale of 1-10 I am right there on 8.  So here’s a list of some of the things I do to keep the good aura going in my life.

  • I speak to my daughter over the phone every single day.  Hearing from her makes a good start to my morning and I tell her how much I love her each day.
  • Mondays used to be the worst but now I get up wear my favourite outfit and show up for work all glamourous.  Bright colours on a Monday do the trick for me and I just breeze through the day with ease.
  • I exercise 4 to 5 times a week, the feel good hormones I get from that are priceless.  I can face my day with positive vibes.
  • I dance myself silly when a song I like appears on my playlist, (when I am at home of course) we can’t be getting our groove on during working hours now can we…
  • I listen to all genres of music, at work, at home, when I work out, music is definitely good for my soul.
  • I go out with my friends occasionally and party on, you know what they say, all work and no play.
  • I blog, my new found hobby, I thoroughly enjoy it and I bump into interesting reads every day.  It is a different and educative hobby, I still don’t know why I didn’t start on it earlier.
  • I make sure I smile and be very helpful at work no matter how my day is going, I make it a point that everyone I assist leaves our office with good things to say about our company and me obviously!
  • When a client gives me a hard time at work, I tell myself they probably have their own personal issues that they are going through and don’t take it to heart.
  • I surround myself with happy people, there is nothing as bad as having friends who are always complaining about something and never taking time to look at the positive things in life, no matter how small.
  • I try and do something nice for those close to me, a phonecall, a surprise visit, a small gift, anything to make someone else’s day.
  • I don’t let the father of my daughter steal my joy when we disagree on something, I just breathe in and out and say forgive him for he does not know any better (attempt to pray for him instead of the other insane options going through my head)  and my day goes on.
  • I try to mind my own business as much as I can that way drama and gossip are not a part of my life for the sake of peace.
  • And most importantly I pray, I put all my burdens and worries to God because if i didn’t do so I know I would have probably lost my mind from worry by now.

Find out what makes you happy and do exactly that.  Start one day a time and before you know it each day will be better than the last.  Life is too short; make a list of things you need to do each day and make sure you make happiness an everyday goal!