Relationship Deal Breakers

Show me a woman who doesn’t want a man with a plan and I will show you a liar! – MaKupsy 2017

Hello my lovings, it’s another beautiful day.  I don’t know why this week I have been inspired to write about relationships.  Maybe it’s a sign that I should be a Relationship Coach?  It’s the only explanation I can think of really because lately I seem to have the answers to everyone else’s relationship problems except mine!  Then again, it isn’t always a great idea to do the first thing that comes to mind right so let me stick to blogging and fitness for now.

The following deal breakers apply to both male and female so pay attention this might be the reason why one or some of your relationships have not worked out.

Poor Hygiene

I don’t know about you but personally if the person who is supposedly pursuing me is not friends with taking a bath that might be an actual reason to go our separate ways.  I think that we should all love ourselves enough to take care of our bodies and that includes basic things like taking a bath, brushing your teeth, cutting your nails, flushing after yourself when you leave the toilet and wearing clean ironed clothes!!  It might sound basic on paper but some people couldn’t care less and go around looking like they just walked out of a maize field and expect to get a partner looking like that?

Inability To Spend

Now before you raise your eyebrows I am not talking about a man spending money on a woman.  I am talking about an individual spending money on THEMSELVES.  This right here is an actual cause of concern because if you are not occasionally spoiling yourself with the finer things what are the chances of you doing the same for a partner if you end up with one?  However, this can work either way because one may not necessarily spend on themselves but will spend on their partner…BUT it’s very rare that this happens; it’s complicated really.

Drive & Ambition

Show me a woman(man) who doesn’t want a man with a plan and I will show you a liar!  As you get older relationships become less of “Let’s see how this goes” and more of “What’s the plan between us”.  By plan I don’t mean a couple getting marriage which is a great idea by the way.  In this case I mean a plan to work together and encourage each other to reach personal and couple goals.  A plan for what your day, weekend, month or year together will look like.  Nothing brings a yawn fest as much as having a partner who has no plan whatsoever for the team.  Remember a relationship is a team effort and if you are the only one driving the team you will get tired and that right there will be the beginning of many problems to come.  I once had a conversation with a friend who told me that in order for people to have less stress in relationships they should try and pair up with people who “mirror them”.  Loosely translated to be with someone who has dreams, aspirations and the same energy as you do that way you will be team players and not have a situation of a pilot and a passenger in the relationship.

Dishonesty

This has to be the biggest deal breaker for me.  If you are in a relationship feelings change for the worst or the best and that is perfectly okay.  It is always best to communicate how you feel about the next person because even though some of the honesty might hurt it saves a couple time.  For example, if you fall out of love with someone don’t keep quiet about it and hope things will change.  Sometimes all you need to do is talk about it with your partner and find ways to bring back the fire.  If that fails then do the adult thing and break up amicably.  Most people choose to keep quiet about how they feel and end up cheating and hurting more people than necessary in the process.  If you are about this relationship business then you have to start getting your communication skills in tip top shape.

We were all brought up differently and when you get into a relationship this is the first thing you need to remind yourself.  What might be perfectly normal to you might be foreign to the next person.  You have to be patient and get to learn what you are both about but it doesn’t mean you have to stay on if you are unhappy.  Your happiness comes first and after you have tried everything to try and blend in it’s fine to walk away and take care of yourself.

These are the four main deal breakers for me.  What are yours?

I know I didn’t add cheating but it’s so cliche everyone says they won’t tolerate cheating but most people end up putting up with it when they find out but that’s a story for a completely different day.

Today, let’s talk about what will stop you from dating that one person you have your eye on?

©MaKupsy 2017

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A List Of Things I Can’t Stand

A list of things that I really can not stand and things that grate on my nerves:

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  • That long pinky nail that some men keep.  The other day I saw a guy who actually had nail polish on that finger.  Imagine the shock on my face!
  • People who leave hair on the soap bar, that is beyond revolting.  What in the world are you thinking leaving your hair on there, that might be your pubic hair you expect the next person to pluck out of that bar of soap.  Have some regard for others!
  • I can’t deal with people who shout over the phone.  Like what ever happened to speaking?
  • People who chew bubble gum, especially professional people.  There is this colleague of mine all suited up, attending to customers and chewing bubble gum, for the why?
  • Poor Customer Service that one really has me all worked up.  If I am paying for a service I expect to get great service otherwise me and my hard earned money are leaving.
  • Gossip.  Okay fine, I am guilty of gossiping as well but you don’t want to hang out with people who gossip all the time.  There are so many things to talk about that are actually productive and life changing.  How about we try that for a change?
  • Parents who put weaves on their toddlers. WHY???
  • Parents who do not cut their children’s nails.  I have seen countless toddlers with dirty nails.  Can the parents not see that their children need to get their nails cut?  Imagine all that dirt stuck in the child’s nails.  When they eventually eat all those germs will dig into their food and straight into their mouths.  It is unhygienic and untidy!
  • Parents who assist their children in bunking after school activities like swimming.  You are only disadvantaging your child, allow him or her to be an all rounder if need be, they will need it in the future.
  • Parents who watch their children throw tantrums in public places and do nothing about it.
  • Sweat.  People walk in and out of my office on a daily basis.  There is this one particular customer who will be wreaking of sweat at 8am. ((Like what the actual fuck?))  I understand we all sweat but what’s your story so early in the morning?  Now I keep air freshener at my desk specifically for eliminating early morning body odour. YUCK!
  • People who go on about how they were in the first team of some sport when we were back in senior school.  Honestly, that was close to a decade ago.  Let’s celebrate current achievements please.
  • Holier than though individuals.  We all know these; they act like they have never done a questionable thing all their life.  Judgmental much?
  • People who are too much.  I don’t know how to best describe them.  Say…once they start helping you with something they want to tell you how to do everything.  Or when they tell you about a movie they spoil it for you by telling you every single bit of that movie.
  • People who burp in your presence and not excuse themselves.  How do you just continue to eat or talk after making such a sound in my face, just tell me how??
  • Inconsiderate people.  Too many times I have seen people standing in line and not giving a pregnant woman or an elderly person the chance to go ahead of the queue.  That could be you one day you know and besides it is only considerate to let them go ahead and get on with their day.
  • Public transport.  I really should buy my own car soon.  The whole hassle of bunching up in a minibus is just too much.  And the music they play can be such a drag especially if you don’t listen to that particular genre and lastly the toddlers who keep stepping on your clothes with the mother acting like she can’t see it.  I NEED A MIRACLE IN THE CAR DEPARTMENT!!!
  • Nosy Parkers. ( I prefer calling them Nosy Fuckers)  Always wanting to know your business, what you are up to, who you are doing, why you are doing it.  Get a grip and live your life.
  • People who are full of themselves.  I already am full of myself so we can’t all be like that, who will notice the other? HAHAHA. On a serious note being vain is not good look,
  • Unexpected Visitors; it’s a NO for me.
  • Lazy people. Get up and do something!
  • People who drag their feet…Pick up your feet and walk properly already!
  • People who always try to ruin a perfect moment. ( I like to call them Kill Joys)  For example, you send them a picture of a mutual friend all happy with their new partner.  Next thing they start bad mouthing them instead of just being happy. Geez
  • Weddings.  They drag on and on and on.  For that reason I have only attended two weddings to date.  Let’s just get to the fun part please I don’t like things that go on forever.
  • Internet bullying…I shall dig deeper into this at some point this year.
  • Whatsapp.  This has completely run it’s course in my life, once my Whatsapp bundles expire I am leaving that platform.
  • People who write endless whatsapp status messages going on and on about what their partner has done for them.  Enough already, we get the point.  Or maybe I am just jealous?  We will never know…
  • And finally I can’t stand my own handwriting.  It has gone from bad to worse to terrible over the past few years.  I don’t even call it a handwriting anymore.  Words fail me. LOL

MaKupsy