Is This Your Enemy Of Progress?

I believe we all have that one thing that we know is an enemy of progress.  It can be laziness, lack of faith, that one ex who calls and suddenly has you thinking of taking them back, the love for money and even sex! Being an adult comes without a manual but through experience you get to know yourself better and realise when certain temptations hit all that progress you had made is about to come crumbling down…

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Image from Pinterest

My love for natural sweet white wine will be the death of me!  I just love it so much it may as well be my best friend.  Last year my poison was Vodka but it came with stomach cramps the next day.  I had an affair with red wine that didn’t last for long because I would have a splitting headache the next day.  I finally decided to try out white wine and I absolutely loved it!  I remember Chef Takura(single and very sexy but he has a beard so he isn’t a potential candidate) recommending it to me and it listening to him was the best decision I ever made.  The one thing I love about white wine is I usually have it from the comfort of my warm bed and just after two glasses I am off to la la land.  I prefer having it on the occasional weekend that way I don’t feel so guilty for indulging in something I know is an enemy of progress in the fitness department.  I have a bottle all weekend though, that’s much better than having 3 bottles during the course of a weekend, yes, no?  (trying to defend the error of my ways here)

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Image from Pinterest

I have had days were my whole day has been mapped by the things I have read, seen or watched on social media.  There was a week when the #MenAreTrash hash tag was trending on almost all social media platforms.  It was the most heartbreaking week of my life.  The stories I read about what women go through left me feeling blue.  I remember sharing my own story on my timeline and after that all the negative thoughts and feelings from the past came back to haunt me.

The very same platforms that bear sad news also come with beautiful things such as travel, love, relationships all wrapped in one.  Now this stuff will make you wish you can order a partner just like the one you saw on Instagram!  Don’t do it to yourself, take it from me.  People will always show you the bright side of their lives and hardly ever the problems they are going through.  Next thing you will contemplate breaking up with your partner because they have not taken you for a surprise getaway weekend to Italy, you will die from stress o!  To make matters worse you can actually go an entire morning surfing through the internet giving yourself self inflicted stress.  This is why you should stick to reading blogs like mine instead, nothing but good times only here.  However, I have found a way to deal with this and that is by simply taking time off social media.  Spend your time on other fulfilling activities that will not leave you green with envy or constantly comparing your life with the next person. Remember that comparison will steal your joy.  Do not let this be your enemy of progress!

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Image from Pinterest

Negative energy is real.  Ever noticed how some people just love to complain about any and everything and once you are done talking to them you wonder why you are feeling miserable.  I am one person who values their peace of mind.  There are so many things going wrong in our country that could easily send you straight to your death while you are asleep the last thing you need is spending time with a “Negative Nancy”.  I understand that we all have problems and sometimes all you want to do is vent and get someone else to listen to you.  That’s perfectly fine but it is NOT okay to vent for an entire day.  Do you have any idea how that drains the next person?  Please do not do it to your loved ones.  If you decide to vent by all means do so but with all the venting make sure you come up with a solution to the problem together and act on it.  No one wants to spend time with negative people, they steal your joy.  Next time someone tries to ruin your day remember that it is your right to protect your peace and you can politely tell them to take their negative energy elsewhere.

I would love to hear from you.  What are some of your enemies of progress and how do deal with them?

©MaKupsy 2017

 

 

 

Chop Chop Brazilian Steak House

We have long since agreed that I am a lover of fine things so it will come as no surprise that I already got to check out the new joint in town, Chop Chop Brazilian Steak House.  This was actually a surprise outing so I was not looking the part so there will be no filtered selfies in this post.  The plus side of this place is that it’s right in town and just a 5 minute walk from my place of residence.  I was excited to find out if they had better service than News Cafe Fife Avenue because this was going to determine if they will be my go to place when I am feeling lazy to cook.

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I am one of those individuals who always asks the person waiting on me which dish I should try if I am at a new place.  I didn’t want to have chicken, I have eaten it in so many different forms it’s the last thing I want to eat when I go out.  She recommended I try out the Chop Chop Pizza.  In the interim I ordered a cappuccino and I was disappointed when it came through.  This cappuccino looked unhappy and malnourished; it didn’t even have a smiley face.  I have seen happier cappuccino’s in my life to be honest.  I am particular about the small details and this already got me less excited.

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USD2 😦

I took it in slowly while I waited on the pizza which surprisingly didn’t take long.  I am sure the wait was just 5 minutes and it was ready.  My Blesser Lite ordered chicken and chips and it was then that I realised there was nothing green in both our plates.  When the waitress came we ordered a veggie mix and I felt so much relief because food doesn’t make sense for me if it isn’t colourful.

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Behold the Chop Chop Pizza

Prices for image above:

Cappuccino : USD2

Mixed Veggies : USD3

Chop Chop Pizza : USD8

The presentation was alright but the truth is when I took my first bite of the pizza I was not wowed.  I always insist that if you eat out the experience must be a shock to the system.  I mean what’s the point if you pay for a meal that doesn’t impress you, might as well not go right?  I expected more from them, the way it had been hyped and the way I was excited each time I ran past the building watching renovations taking place during my morning jog… it was a real train smash.

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USD11

 

We ordered dessert and I chose Apple Crumble because it tastes divine; they serve it with ice cream but I’m used to having it with custard but there is always room to try new things.  The apple crumble did not disappoint, I loved every bite of it!  I didn’t know how to combine it with the ice cream so I just had a spoonful here and there till I had finished it.

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USD4

My Blesser Lite loves things and even though he insisted he was full after eating a whole half chicken and chips he ordered a chocolate cake which he didn’t finish because he complained that it was too rich.

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I would have eaten the remaining cake myself if I still had space for it!  I was stuffed.  I only ate 2 slices of pizza, part of his chips and part of the salad and I was good.  I had to ask the waitress to pack away my food because I had plans for it for today.  I will probably have it for lunch.  I ordered a glass of hot water with lemon because I felt too full and needed something to make the bloated feeling go away.

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The face you make when you are officially stuffed!

The few things I liked about the place were:

  • The waitress was helpful
  • The restaurant is clean
  • The dessert was alright
  • They have both a swipe and Ecocash facility

I did not like:

  • The food was bland, we may as well have gone to Pizza Slice and had a better meal
  • The ambiance was nothing to ride home about
  • I don’t recall any music being played
  • The experience was nothing out of the ordinary

I think the only thing that made the evening bearable was the fact that I had good company otherwise had I been on my own I would have not lasted 10 minutes in there.  On a scale of 0-10, 10 being completely satisfied with my experience I will give Chop Chop Brazilian Steak House a 4.  I would like to believe they are still new in town and probably after a few weeks in the business they will up their game.  I have faith in them because it would be nice to come back to something that will bedazzle me.

In my opinion Chop Chop is Pizza Slice that went to Private School.

The End

©MaKupsy 2017

The Other Woman

Love her or hate her, the other woman exists and chances are she will continue to exist till the end of time.  I’m not saying your boyfriend or husband has her; not all men are cut out for that.  However, if you are one of the unfortunate few he has one and it is highly likely that she is not going anywhere anytime soon.

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Image from Google

I was the other woman, once upon a time…how did I end up there?  A case of a long distance relationship gone wrong and after that I told myself I was not going to do relationships until further notice so a situationship was more ideal for me then.  Couple that with insecurities from a failed relationship and not realising my worth, I easily settled for being the other woman in a heartbeat.  I used to enjoy the thrill of the secret relationship, the attention was priceless because he would try to compensate for the time he was not able to be with me.

This is a phase in my life I look back to and ask myself what the heck was I thinking? But you know what they say, everything that happens to you is a learning curve.  Thankfully that phase only lasted a short while and was over before it even started because I clearly could not stand being an option in his life.  Believe me when I tell you that kind of emotional stress is not good for anyone, at all!   Ask me if I will ever travel down that road again?  The answer is a definite NO!  It was a phase I am not proud of to date.

That is one of my favourite tracks by Changing Faces – The Other Woman and they are mainly singing about why they are no longer willing to share a man because they have finally realised what they deserve. (love is not so blind after all) However, not all women share the same sentiments because below are a few who are currently the other woman and not complaining about it.

“I enjoy the financial benefits that come with being the other woman, I have never worked a day in my life and “my husband” provides me and our children with everything we need.” Small House

“Sex with someone who isn’t my boyfriend every once in a while is a thrilling experience, you know what they say about variety being the spice of life.” The SexAHolic

“There is a sense of adventure, things done in secret give me an adrenaline rush and I got hooked to it I simply can’t stop.” The Side Chic

“I don’t have to worry about attending funerals, washing his clothes, cooking for him, I get to see him at his best and get to spend quality time with him.” The Cougar

“I get my rent paid, my child taken care of, endless outings, someone to sponsor my drinking habit and never having to worry about how I am going to put food on the table, that’s his job!” The Alcoholic

“Since we don’t see each other often when I do see him there is no time for fighting, I always look forward to seeing him.” Miss No Pressure

“I have been lied to and deceived one too many times, it is better to be with a married guy who won’t make empty promises to me.” Miss Content

“I have my own money, I can take care of myself but I don’t have the time for a full on relationship.  I only see him as and when I am free because I have a busy schedule so being the other woman works for me.” Miss Independent 

Relationships are complicated if you let them be, but from my experience being the other woman never ends well.  It seems for the women above it is working to their advantage and they are happy.  I say, life is too short so one must do whatever makes them happy as long as it gives them sleep at night.

What’s your take on the “other woman”?  I am happy to read on both negative and possibly positive things you have to say about her in the comments section below.

©MaKupsy 2017

The Single Independent Mother

I have some saving tips from a single mother who is in her 40’s.  I think everyone will benefit from this post and I took this pretty seriously because she clearly has more years experience on raising a child single-handedly.  Take out your pen and paper…

  1. Cut your hair, imagine the amount of money you are spending on hairdos that you could be saving for better use for you and your child.
  2. Live within your means.
  3. Do not compare yourself with people who are married, they have a double income you only have one, stay in your lane.
  4. Save some money each month, it doesn’t matter how little, trust me it will go a long way.
  5. Do not buy on credit, especially clothes, save to pay everything with cash.
  6. Take a lunchbox to work with healthy home made meals or sandwiches.
  7. Make friends with women in a similar situation who understand your struggles better.
  8. Do what works for you, do not try to please anyone.
  9. Set targets for yourself and make sure you reach them, it might take time but eventually you will get there.
  10. Learn how to sew, simple things like replacing a button and hemming your pants will go a long way for your pocket.

If you live by most of these rules you might actually get round to going for that holiday you have been dying for!

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Photo Credit : @summer_rose_ (Instagram)

©MaKupsy 2017

Speak Things Into Existence

Believe me when I tell you that the universe pays attention when you speak.  Many moons ago I wished for a tall, good looking man who dressed up nice and would shower me with flowers; I have a serious weakness for them it’s insane.  I used to tell my colleagues almost everyday how my handsome prince would come for me and guess what, months down the line I was in a relationship with a guy who fit those specifications to a tee.   Like how was that even possible?

I remember this one time I tagged along when my friend when she was going to court.  I was heavily pregnant at the time and when I saw the women standing in line for Child Maintenance issues I said; “One day I will be standing in line too given the drama we are always going through with the father of my child”.  Again I tell you, the universe pays attention, I was in that exact same line 5 years later going through the most.  I spoke this into existence and I don’t even know why I was surprised when it actually happened.

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image from Pinterest

Thankfully, there are some pretty good things that have happened.  The one time I was going through pictures on the internet and wishing for a holiday.  Something about the Christmas holiday makes me feel like travelling.  I had my eyes on Cape Town and told myself it was going to happen and it did!  My sister is the best for making it happen and you should find yourself a sister just like her!

From my experience when it comes to self talk, the more positive things you say to yourself the better your experience outcomes.  When I started my fitness journey I was outspoken; most people didn’t understand how a “big” woman could have so much self love but they were never ready for the extra confidence that would come once I lost the weight.   I used to go for my runs without music just to have a chance to speak to myself and encourage myself throughout the run.  I would tell myself things like:

  • You’ve got this, just one more kilometer to go
  • Wait till you do your weigh in tomorrow and see how much work you have put in
  •  They are not ready for the after run photo I am going to post on Instagram
  • Who would have thought I would ever run 10K
  • The way I am smashing that cellulite on my thighs right now though
  • Girl you are on fire did you hear that pace on the voice over!

You see, all that self talk got me to push myself and my body to the limit.  Imagine if I had been telling myself negative things.  This body would have never come to life, it’s a pity I can’t show it to you, it’s still illegal to walk around naked this part of the world.

I have a whole list of other positive things that I have asked the universe to grant me after I realised she actually pays attention.  No more random negative thoughts because I certainly don’t want to end up in situations I will dearly regret.  Lately I ask for good health, success, financial security, a whole Land Rover Discovery (in red of course), to be the first Nike Woman in Zimbabwe and a rich husband.  Speak things into existence people!!

In whatever you do, be good to yourself.  Speak of all the beautiful things about yourself and those around you and the universe will also respond positively.

What are some of the things you speak into existence?  Have any of them come to life, care to share?

©MaKupsy 2017

Self Worth

I got this message from a friend on mine through WhatsApp.  I thought I would share it here, it’s quite thought provoking.

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In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question:

‘What kind of man are you looking for?’

She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in
the eye & asking, ‘Do you really want to know?’ Reluctantly, he said,
Yes.

She began to expound,

‘As a woman in this day & age, I am in a
position to ask a man what can you do for me that I can’t do for
myself?

I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the
help of any man… or woman for that matter. I am in the position to
ask, ‘What can you bring to the table?’

The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought & stated,

‘I am not referring to money. I need something more.
I need a man who is striving for excellence in every aspect of life.

He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, & asked her to explain.

She said,
‘I need someone who is striving for excellence mentally because I need
conversation & mental stimulation. I don’t need a simple-minded man.
I need someone who is striving for excellence spiritually because I
don’t need to be unequally yoked…believers mixed with unbelievers is
a recipe for disaster.

I need a man who is striving for excellence financially because I don’t need a financial burden. I need someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded.

I need someone who has integrity in dealing with relationships. Lies and game-playing are not my idea of a strong man. I need a man who is family-oriented. One who can be the leader, priest and provider to the lives entrusted to him by God.

I need someone whom I can respect. In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn’t taking care of his business.  I have no problem being submissive…he just has to be worthy.

And by the way, I am not looking for him…He will find me. He will recognize himself in me. He may not be able to explain the connection, but he will always be drawn to me. God made woman to be a help-mate for man. I can’t help a man if he can’t help himself. When she finished her spill, she looked at him.

He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said,

‘You are asking for a lot.’

She replied, “I’m worth a lot”. Send this to every woman
who’s worth a lot…. and every man who has the brains to
understand!!!

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Let’s talk about this piece; your thoughts ladies and gentleman!

P.S. I have no idea who wrote this please credit them if you do.

©MaKupsy 2017

I Will Marry For Money

“It’s okay babes; we sleep in this one room and eat our sadza and soup for supper the bottom line is we love each other…”

such fuckery!  Does this love you speak of swipe at Woolworths?

That statement above worked for our parent’s generation not this one.  You will do the most and after all that you get nothing but stress and heartache out of it.

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I see you making a face and saying to yourself, “I don’t believe she just made that her blog title!”  Believe it or not that’s how I feel and I am not changing my mind anytime soon.  You see; growing up I read one too many story books and watched too many Disney Princess cartoons that left me feeling like love was supposed to be all rosy.  There have been hardly any happy endings for me in the relationship department thanks to believing that fairy tales actually translated to real life stories. I made a decision a few years back that if I do decide to get married I am getting hitched to a rich man and I don’t care what anyone else thinks!  I am not trying to have a $2 wedding, if it’s going to happen it’s going to be HUGE!

The great thing about life is that you get to learn from your past mistakes.  Thanks to them I know that even though love is such a beautiful feeling it is not enough.  Love will not feed me or put a roof over my head.  Love usually fades after a few months or years for some but guess what, money if used wisely will be forever ( insert Janet Jackson story here).  I don’t know about the rest of the women but I will speak for myself when I say if I am going to be with someone I need to feel secure.  I want to know that if I stopped working today my husband will not let me want for anything.  I can still go on lavish trips, go on my shopping sprees, those spa dates will keep coming and above all else my daughter will continue going to that good school we would have enrolled her in because well, I have a rich husband.

Money makes the world go round.

I love watching those historical series like Reign.  They constantly remind me that back in the day people married for power.  Parents made sure that their daughters got married to the “right” family so that they too would benefit from that union.  Love was not something that mattered, most times they were told they would grow to love that person.  Which usually happens anyway, what’s not to love about someone who makes sure you are well taken care of?  So if it worked for them back then, trust me it still works now.

I am not one of those women who believes in 50-50 relationships.  I believe that the man is the head of the house and he should go out there and make that paper.  I think I am a 70-30 kind of woman actually.  Let the man do the leading please and allow me to enjoy being a woman in the background.

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I like beautiful things.  I love to be pampered and spoiled rotten and you can just imagine how extremely happy I will be if I married a rich husband.  I would want to have just one more child if all goes according to plan and trust me I won’t be having that child with anyone who will give me headaches.  Let the headache be about which car I will be driving to work today thank you very much.

Two things will happen if the rich husband doesn’t come along.  Firstly, I am working towards being a rich woman myself so that when he does eventually come we will build a whole empire!  Secondly, If he doesn’t come I will stay unmarried with all my money and enjoy every dime of it.

You guys can do this marry for love thing while I chill and wait for that rich husband to someday sweep me off my feet while working hard towards getting my own money.  If anyone tells you that I got married, best believe that rich husband came my way.

©MaKupsy 2017