Take Time To Unpack

School days are the best days of your life?  I think not!  I remember the year, 1993 it was sometime before Christmas.  My parents told me that I could write up a list of friends I would invite over for a party and I was delighted.  I used to have a birthday celebration each year but it was always with my siblings and hardly ever with my friends so you can imagine the excitement.  A few days later I was informed that we were going to Marondera and I didn’t read much into it.  My grandmother stayed there and we visited her often so for me it was just another trip to see Gogo(grandmother).  I was wrong, we were moving and no one even cared to tell me.

It was only when we arrived in Marondera and we didn’t go to Gogo’s place that I realised that something was amiss.  I was shown our new home and what was going to be my new bedroom and I was not amused.  You see, when we were in Chinhoyi the house we stayed in was tripple the size of the one I saw before my eyes.  The neighbourhood was completely different, I knew no one except my cousins who stayed I didn’t even know where because we met when we all went to Gogo’s place.  I was devastated.  I actually cried buckets and told my parents I wanted to go back to Chinhoyi and be with my friends, my school and everything that I was familiar with.  Mothers back then didn’t take tantrums lightly and my mother would whoop my ass for being dramatic.  I cried myself to sleep so many nights, I missed my friends.  I missed home.

I had to attend a new school and as you can imagine I felt like an outsider.  Making friends was a real mission.  I loved sport, I could swim and play tennis but I didn’t make it to the team because the school already had their set of students they had already “chosen”.  I remember taking up hockey instead and I struck some luck there and ended up being in the team.  Even after trying to make friends through sport people didn’t seem to like me.  I was bullied and secluded.  The one time all the girls in my class called for a meeting and sat me down.  I don’t remember what it was about but I remember walking home in tears and wishing I would either go back to Chinhoyi or die.  Children can be really cruel and to date I don’t understand why they treated me that way.

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Image from Google

At home my father never wanted me to leave the house.  I was always under lock and key.  The only time I was allowed to play outside the gate was when I went out to ride my bicycle.  That was one of my favourite things to do.  A few weeks after we moved my bicycle was stolen and I was left with nothing else to do with my time.  Eventually I was allowed to go and play with children my age but only till a certain time of day then it was back to being under lock and key.

I still have memories of having to sit outside during break time by myself because the other girls were “punishing me”.  Was it because they had already established who their friends were and I was messing up things for them by being the newbie?  Was it because I loved to take part in sporting activities?  Was it because I didn’t know anything about the town?  I had and still have so many questions because I can’t imagine why people would have such a strong feeling of dislike of someone they really didn’t know.

I never looked forward to going to school.  I hated every minute of it.  I remember telling my parents about what was happening but they brushed it off.  There were a lot of incidents that happened that I won’t dwell on because as it is I am typing this and crying at the same time, the wounds are resurfacing all over again!  I grew up telling myself that once I am done with school I am never coming back to Marondera if it’s the last thing I do.  I hate that place, it has so many unpleasant memories.  Each time I travel and I start feeling home sick it’s not Marondera I will be thinking of, I will be thinking of my home here in Harare.  It was only yesterday that it dawned on me that this is the reason I never enjoy my visits to Marondera, the place haunts me…

 

©MaKupsy 2016

You Can Make It Happen!

I like to describe myself as a “Go Getter” because from a very young age I have managed to make things happen on my own.  I think the huge age gap between my siblings and I played a part in that because I felt like an only child.  They were in boarding school the greater part of the time and I was at home with my parents with no one else to play with except myself. That right there is the one reason I became one adventurous child.  I had nothing but time on my hands and I experimented with climbing trees, playing tennis and attempting to walk from preschool to our house because my dad had delayed in picking me up.  The adventures are plenty and I am going to tell you all about them.

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3 year old me 🙂 Kariba

Swimming

Anyone who claims to know me will tell you that I LOVE to swim.  That’s my summer highlight.  I am out in my swimwear ready to dive into some cool, calming water.  It’s my next exercise of choice, actually, it’s not even an exercise it’s one of the many things I love to do.  How did it all start?  Everyone in my family can swim and the time we stayed in Kariba we would all go to the pool for an afternoon of fun in the sun.  They took me with them, put some floaters on my arms and let me enjoy the water.  When we moved to Chinhoyi a few years later my swimming obsession went crazy because we had a swimming pool by our house and at every given opportunity I was out there trying to learn how to swim with or without supervision.  I remember the one time I slipped and nearly drowned; I thought if my mother had found out  I had gone unsupervised I was going to die twice!! I continued to teach myself how to swim and by the time I started preschool I was water confident and remember graduating from the shallow end to the deep end in a matter of weeks.  Years later, Miss Kupsy has inherited my love for swimming and I take her with at every opportunity.

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Image from Google

Riding A Bike

I had a cute little red and yellow tricycle. Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures of it but I remember it very vividly.  I loved that little tricycle, it got me to the swimming pool faster than the speed of lighting. I soon outgrew it and got a bicycle with helpers as a birthday gift.  Seeing that my parents were at work the greater part of the time it was up to me to learn to how to ride the “big bike”.  I don’t know how many times I fell off that little bike but with every fall I kept getting back up and trying again.  That very day I remember my dad driving in and me racing my bike down the drive way to show him that I had figured out how to ride my bike.  He was so proud of me and promised to let me ride it to see one of my friends who stayed close by after a few days.  I still have scars on my knees from the countless falls I had on that day but they were all worth it because if I had not pushed myself I probably would have never learnt how to do so.

60e946cc-7cba-4ca4-b3ab-fdfc6e93561aSocial Media

I remember begging the father of my child to teach me how to use Twitter.  The guy would act like I was talking to myself.  He just said open an account and figure it out.  I was thoroughly annoyed.  I really thought he would sit down with me and give me a full on lecture on how to Tweet!  I was dying for a break from Facebook so I decided I would sign up and give it a try.  My first tweet read; “Tweet tweet hurray” not bad for a first timer right?  Don’t ask about the hash tags though, in my defense I was still new to the application and I was trying to navigate my way around it.  6 years later my followers have grown and not only do I have a Lifestyle Blog; I also have a Fitness Blog and a Fitness Movement that stemmed from my use of Twitter and social media.  My social media presence has exposed me to different opportunities and I continue to network with people who have dropped some valuable gems in my life.  I can safely say that the use of social media helped me to find my purpose.

If there is one thing that I have learnt through all the above experiences it is the fact that self taught skills are the best experiences life has to offer.  If you really want something sometimes waiting for someone to come and spoon feed you is not the best of decisions.  Get up and do something about those things you want to learn or do.  It can be writing a book,(watch this space for my book in December 2018!!) going back to school, designing a website, applying for that Visa and get to explore a whole new continent.  Whatever the case might be the power is within you to make it happen.

 

However, you must remember that it will take time.  If you want to build something worth your while make an extra effort to learn as much as you can on the subject at hand, network with those in the know, keep voice memos when an idea comes to mind; you don’t want to let it slip your mind!  Above all else, keep believing that you can do anything you set your mind to.

You are the creator of your own destiny.

Do tell me about some of the things on your to-do-list.  Have you already started working on them or you are waiting for a miracle to happen?

©MaKupsy 2017

 

 

Fitness In The Park!

Let’s be honest, gym membership is expensive.  With subscriptions ranging from $50 to $150 per month it’s no wonder most people don’t hit the gym. I mean, how many of us can afford those prices, definitely not me!  If you have been following my health and fitness journey on social media you will already know that I managed to lose 10kgs in a year through eating right and without attending a single gym session.  This is what this meet up in the park is going to be all about, helping you achieve your fitness goals without breaking a budget.

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The event is open to everyone and I am encouraging you to come through no matter your fitness levels.  Remember we are always learning new things everyday and this will be a platform to share experiences and map a way forward for your fitness journey.

For more information on the event you can call or WhatsApp the numbers on the flyer.  You can also check out my Fitness Blog for different articles on health and fitness over here.  Alternatively you can Like my Facebook page to join a team that is seriously enthusiastic about fitness.

This the first of many events to come and I hope to see you there!

MaKupsy© 2017

Are You Comfortable In Your Clothes?

A few months ago I decided to finally attend an event that most Hararians rave about the last Sunday of each month.  It always took place when I was out of town but this time I made sure I was available.  I only arrived sometime after 6pm and because it was winter I made sure I was fully dressed in my tights, boots, dress, jacket and scarf!  Yes, I am THAT scared of the cold.

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However, when I arrived I noticed that most of the women were dressed in shorts, tights, mini skirts and short summer dresses.  I checked out the guys and the majority of them were in jeans, t shirts and a jacket; all dressed up to keep warm.  This event starts at midday which is a great idea because you can get to show off your nice bits in the warm sun and if you want to leave early you can do so after having a great afternoon.  If you decide to stay on for the rest of the evening I think you will need to have a plan because goodness was it cold that day or what!  I could see a few women with goosebumps from a mile away and it had me thinking if they were really comfortable with their dress choice for the day or they were braving it out for the love of fashion.  Don’t get me wrong I love me some sassy clothes but I just think that sometimes us women put ourselves through the most!

I have another example.  This one time I decided to go and watch a cricket match. Me being me, I thought well, I am going for a sporting event let me wear a pair of shorts, top, sunglasses and a comfortable tennis shoes and be on my way.  Did I just not get the shock of my life when I got there.  Some women were in 6 inch heels!!  How people, tell me how?  There was obviously going to be a lot of cheering, dancing jumping and down happening and I can’t even begin to imagine just how these women were planning on enjoying their afternoon dressed in killer heels so to speak.

Do not get me wrong, this post is not meant to bash anyone for the way they dress.  If anything I actually want to know from some women why they choose to dress this way for occasions you would think were not that deep.  LOL. Have you seen how guys are always fully clothed when you go out?  Why are we putting ourselves through this much torture?  I call it torture because I don’t want to freeze my ass off in the cold when I know I could easily wear something warm or end up feeling unhappy because I am wearing shoes that are definitely not for the occasion.  When I go out I make sure that I am comfortable and happy.  I will go clubbing and never leave the dance floor because I don’t have to keep pulling my dress down or have to hold my shoes in my hand because my feet are now painful and stopping me from pulling some epic dance moves!

I asked a few guys their opinion on this issue of wearing skimpy clothes and this is what they had to say:

GUY ONE: I don’t see a problem with that dressing if you’re going for the day look but if you’re planning on being there all night then I think it’ll be wise of you to wear something that says “I’m here to relax, have a good time, look and feel comfortable & warm” something that doesn’t make it seem like you’re trying too hard to be noticed. I mean after all simple is sexy I always say. The problem is some dress to be noticed by others at the expense of themselves. “Dress for a cause not applause!” i.e dress for yourself. That ka simpleness is hella attractive!

GUY TWO: Okay well here’s the thing. I think some women dress like that to feel comfortable, especially if it’s hot. Maybe some would be looking for attention from guys, that is “seizing a bae” but ultimately I think it’s about what they feel comfortable in. If it’s going to be cold, it’s probably advisable if they bring leggings, a jacket or something to wear when it gets colder.

GUY THREE: I am just going to be honest and open about this, I WISH WOMEN DID THIS MORE, I love it!

GUY FOUR: Guys will dress more safely perhaps because guys don’t particularly go crazy because of what to wear at an occasion. They will be concentrating on what is going to happen when you get to the occasion, for example, going for a braai.  They are interested in the braaing aspect and probably how much alcohol they will drink, nothing about dress code.  Over and above I think women should just adopt this kind of attitude (what are the chances though) dress appropriately but still look really good.

So ladies, I want to hear from you, are you comfortable in what you choose to wear for an occasion? Who helps you decide on your outfit for the day and do you have a back up plan for when the weather changes up on you or you are on that “Fashion knows no weather tip”?  Let’s talk.

 

©MaKupsy 2016

 

 

 

 

Losing Weight Is NOT Expensive

Hello my darlings, I hope you had a restful weekend.  For us in Zimbabwe, last week was the shortest working week because we only started work on Wednesday thanks to a long holiday.  Now it’s back to normal working days and Monday never felt so blue.  However, I am here to make you feel better if you are one of those people who always tell themselves I will start exercising or working out when Monday comes.

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A lot of people have the “Dieting is expensive excuse” when you ask them about their eating habits.  Well, I will have you know that it’s not true.  It is all about portion control.  Eat what is available but just make sure you cut down on the quantities.  For example; if you have been eating 8 slices of bread for breakfast, cut them down to 4.  From experience, the body needs gradual change.  If you do something too drastic it will reject it.  I have seen people who wake up one morning and claim that they are on a diet and go all day surviving on water and eating one meal a day.  Do not do that to yourself!  You will starve and the next thing that will happen is you eating everything in sight trying to make up for the day you were on “a diet”.   Like I said, make small changes and your body will adjust accordingly.

The other thing you should aim to do when you are trying to lose weight is making your own meals.  I am a fitness girl on a budget and I rarely spend my money on take out because I know I can cook way better.  When I go to work I always try and pack a lunchbox and make sure I pack a healthy meal and snacks in advance to avoid eating the wrong foods. (insert chocolate, doughnuts, cake, all things you can think of that are an enemy of weight loss progress).  When you make your own meals you have more control over what goes into your food.  Most of these take outs are packed with calories and we aren’t trying to have more of those in your diet.  On a typical day I will fix an egg, lettuce and tomato sandwich and have it with a cup of horrible green tea with lemon.  I do not like green tea at all, I only drink it for the health benefits.  The great thing about sandwiches is you can play around with ideas depending on what you have available.

P.S Leftovers make great packed lunch ideas.

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Image from Google

Lastly, you don’t have to join the gym in order to lose weight.  Remember we are all about saving money in this post so look for an activity you enjoy doing.  Running, power walking, swimming, playing sport, YouTube workout videos.  Thanks to technology you can now watch and download workout videos and try them out in the comfort of your home. Some people are really body conscious and this will be a great idea for them instead of going to a gym where everyone’s attention will be on them. g

There you have it, there is no reason why you should not be working on your body to have it looking the way you want it to.  It won’t be easy when you start but trust me as time goes by you will enjoy seeing the results so much that you will want to outdo yourself.  Speaking of outdoing yourself, also know when to stop and start maintaining your weight.  I have seen some people with to-die-for bodies lose their figure because they didn’t know when to stop.  If friends and family keep telling you it’s time you slow down then maybe you need to hear them out.  They usually have your best interests at heart.

Have you started on your weight loss journey?  If not, what excuse do you have today?  Do you think you will ever start or the Monday will never come?

 

©MaKupsy 2016

 

Sports Interview With Tonderai Chigumbura

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Tonderai Sean Chigumbura

You would have thought a Sports Interview was going to be one of the very first interviews I did considering how much I love to exercise and stay fit and healthy.  But alas it only occurred to me just the other day that I had to do one and here it is.  I hope the guys will be motivated to go out there and work hard on their physic because the young man I interviewed is nothing short of strong and masculine.  I know the ladies will enjoy this read the most for all the wrong reasons 🙂  

  1. What is your full name?

Tonderai Sean Chigumbura

  1. How old are you?

23

  1. What is your health and fitness regime? (We want abs too)

Eating healthy, running and working out at the gym.  I don’t run long distances; it is mostly short but intense.  I run high speed is on the field.

  1. What is your average day like where exercising is concerned?

I go to the gym once in the morning an average of an hour; sometimes I hit the gym twice a day.

  1. What would you say are the benefits of exercising and eating healthy?
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Clearly the results of the gym session are very visible!

High self esteem, you are less prone to illness and you age more gracefully by maintaining your looks and your agility.

  1. Do you play any other sport?

Yes, I swim as well.  I learnt how to swim when I was 7 years old.

  1. What made you settle for rugby?

I started playing rugby at age 15 then I fractured my clavicle (color bone) which is why I stopped swimming and then settled for rugby.

  1. Which position(s) do you play?

Flanker number 7 and Centre number 13

  1. Which clubs have you played for and which one are you currently playing for?

The first Club I played for in Zimbabwe was Harare Sports Club. I then moved to Old Georgians Rugby Club in the same year.  I moved to South Africa where I was at The Sharks Academy in Durban.  I played for Old Boys Rugby Football Club and Jaguars Rugby Football Club.  In Zimbabwe I am currently playing for Harare Sports Club.

  1. Do you have any games lined up for this season locally?

Yes I do but the start date for the season has not yet been confirmed.

  1. Who motivates you?

My late father and myself.

  1. Is there any history of sport in your family?

Yes, my mother did gymnastics and my brothers only played sport till sixth form.

  1. Has playing sport given you the opportunity to travel the world?

Yes it has actually.  I have been to France, United States of America, Dubai, Tunisia, Kenya, Namibia, Zambia, South Africa and Sweden.

  1. How are you giving back to the community?

We do free coaching clinics at the 7s rugby squad for schools in the high density areas.

  1. Relationship status (I know the ladies are dying to know)

Yes, I am in a relationship with Tanasha Sigauke, 6 years now and still going strong.

  1. Where do you see yourself in the next couple of years?

In the next couple of years, God willing, I will be playing at a much more professional stage than I am at the moment. IMG-20150121-WA0008 Lastly, where can people get in touch with you? Facebook Instagram Twitter but my account is inactive, I never got round to learning how to Tweet. LOL So there you have it, next time you go and watch rugby be on the lookout for Tonderai Sean Chigumbura.  Many thanks to him for making time out of his schedule for this interview.   Wishing you nothing but the best in the near future. MaKupsy

Tehn Down For What????

I had an interview with Tehn Diamond on Wednesday at 5:30pm at
Book Cafe.  These were the most interesting 30 minutes I got to spend with “The Happy Smurf”.  It was great to finally meet up and chat and ask him random things about his life and get to share them with you.  I wanted this interview to be different so that readers got to see a side of him that you do not normally read about. tehn-diamond-growing-pains-600x515

 

  • What are your thoughts on Social Media?

I believe everything in this world is neither good nor bad until we touch it; until we decide what it’s going to be.  If you know what you are doing, if you know why you are there and you manage yourself and your time well social media can be very good.  BUT it can easily become an addiction.  It can be very bad if you let it own and control you.

  • Would you consider acting?

It was actually my first love.  I started out as an actor and spent a lot of time on stage.  I was the lead role in most of the plays I did in High School such as Romeo in Romeo and Julliet.  I ended up excelling at my third love despite attempting to venture into acting.  I have managed to do the things I love the most which is rapping, singing and eventually I will look into acting.  I have been offered a number of scripts over the years but time has never been on my side.

  • Have you been in any commercial adverts?

Yes, but a long time ago. It was a Christmas advert which went like “We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, and a happy new year!!”  Unfortunately I can’t seem to remember which company it was but yes, I have been in a commercial advert before.

 

  • Why is Zimbabwe hip hop not taking off like South Africa and Nigeria?
  • We are completely different countries, different setups.
  • South Africa and Nigeria have well defined industry structures.
  • Access to funding.
  • Massive population
  • Zim hip hop fastest growing genre in this country, it’s a shame that people don’t really see that because they are constantly comparing us to our peers in South Africa and Nigeria. We are hot on their heels and this year is going to be the defining year and showcases how big hip hop is in Zimbabwe.
  • What are your personal goals for 2015?

I want to generate $100 000 worth of revenue this year from my various music business activities.

That’s what’s keeping me busy…

  • What have you lined up for your fans, album wise, live performances?

This entire year you will catch me performing somewhere at least once a week.  Alternatively have a look at my website….or type in or hashtag #SOTGNews and something will come up.

Album wise I am finally releasing my debut solo album by the second quarter of the year.

  • Relationship status?

Yes I am in a relationship but I will not be sharing her name.  Some people know her but I believe that in life when you have something you cherish you have to fight for it and protect it to keep the magic alive.

  • How old are you?

I am turning 30 next Saturday and there will be a party here at Book Cafe.

I don’t usually celebrate my birthday; I usually use my birthday to give a gift to my fans such as releasing a song.  I have special things in mind for my big day.

 

  • Do you play sport? When did you start and why did you stop?

No, I don’t have the time.  I enjoy exercising more.

I played a lot of sport when I was in High School.  I played Rugby, Swimming, Water Polo, Basketball, Athletics; I was very much into everything.  I was involved in all extra curricula activities like Toast Masters, Debate, Interact, Drama, Music.  However, my heart was always in entertainment, the moment I left school I simply ditched all the sports stuff and focused on how I was going to get myself on stage for the rest of my life.

  • Any team sport you support?

I never used to watch sport I never used to support a team until I fell in love with Barcelona !! I love everything about that club (I wish it had never happened), they take me high and they take me low…I don’t watch every game though; I will probably just wake up to check the results or watch from twitter.  I will try to watch the Champions League or El Clasico but I try not to let it get out of hand but I love me some Barcelona!

  • What is your take on the youths not respecting their elders?

I believe that what is construed as the youth not respecting their elders is quite generally the natural progression of life.  We come into this world as a broom (clean broom), to renew our values, to continually push the boundaries, to reassess ourselves.  It is the kind of task that is best fitted and suited for the youth.  When you have been on this planet you are set in your ways and not so open to change and not open for innovation and change.  We are all meant to learn from each other; the old from the young and the young from the old and everything in between.  If you go back in time you will hear people saying “Oh but when we were growing up…” It is not supposed to be the same as it was for you because times change and people evolve.

  • What advice would you give to kids who look up to you as their inspiration?

Don’t look up to me, look beyond me.  If I can do anything to inspire you that means you should tell yourself you want to be bigger and better than me.  When people see when things that people say cannot be done being done it expands and opens up the realms of possibility.  Now if some kid somewhere says I want to grow up and be a rapper and if someone objects they can point out and say but this person did it and that means I can do it too!


Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Tehn Diamond

  1. He went to Saint Georges College
  2. He is releasing his debut solo this year titled The Perfect Tehn.
  3. When he left school his plan was to get into Theatre or Movies.
  4. His three loves are acting, singing and rapping in that order.
  5. He doesn’t own a TV; he doesn’t want to be enslaved to it.
  6. He loves hanging out with his little brother and teaching him new things.
  7. He loves to read.
  8. His favourite movie of all time is The Matrix.

It was close to a year ago when he asked me to be a part of the bloggers on his website but back then I had too much on my plate and I could not take part.  Funny how a year later I am interviewing him for my own blog…

Many thanks goes to Tehn Diamond for taking some time out of his busy schedule to meet up for this interview.  You have a great personality and you are very well spoken, no wonder you want to spend your life on stage.  I wish you nothing but the best in 2015 and the year to come.  I will definitely be around for your birthday party next weekend!

MaKupsy

Catching Feelings

 

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Shocked are we? That here I am, actually sitting down to write about love, something that I am always condemning on my social networks and life in general.  Love is a need, I’m not sure if that is fortunate on unfortunate though…because what most of us have gone through in the name of love is bitter sweet.   I can safely say I have done the craziest of things for that thing they call love. Contrary to what most people think on my social networks I actually do believe in love because when you find that special someone it can be the most beautiful thing you have ever experienced in your life.  I am a true sucker for romance, as and when I fall in love with the right person.

Feelings…something that every single person on this planet has.  No one can hide from those, especially when they are love related. But guess what? The year 2013 moving forward seems to not allow people to “catch feelings” as this might cause you to fall in love and probably lead to disappointed, hurt and sometimes death.   So the latest trend is to have fun, enjoy a relationship but by all means necessary, DO NOT CATCH FEELINGS!! How difficult that must be, to know you love someone so deeply but can not express it or if you choose to love do not let the other person know? What has the world come to??  Whatever happened to letting the person in your life know that they are your everything, (your apple in a mango tree type of love), you can not get them out of your mind and they make your heart skip a beat?  I wish I knew the answer too but i do know that i am a part of those people who have chosen the route to not catch any feelings if one can help it.  It’s not something I always agreed to as I am that one person who chooses to love completely…but life and love affects us all in ways we can never fully describe and that led me to making the decision to build a wall around me to protect my heart from “catching feelings”.

 

As fate may have it, that wall I built close to a year ago came crumbling down a few months back.  I am still trying to figure out how that happened.  He was and still is my friend.  You know how it starts…endless Whatsapp messages, spending time together, the outings, the drink-ups (I did a lot of those last festive season) the long phone calls and before you know it you are right there in the midst of that mushy feeling and alarms ringing inside you screaming “you have caught feelings!!!”  My close friends told me this friendship was getting too personal because we were together almost every time, but then i was not complaining, the man was mighty fine.  He was just a bit taller than me, dark n lovely (hehehe) played basketball, worked out at the gym and all that muscle and abs could not have been legal because the way they had an effect on me was orgasmic. hmmm.

Okay, enough about him, back to my feelings. Somewhere somehow I realised that I was falling in love with this fine man. This was not the initial plan though, we were supposed to just have a great time and not get emotionally attached to each other.  I remember my close friends telling me that we were spending way too much time together and eventually this was going to end up as a proper relationship.  I blatantly told them that we were not dating and that any other ideas they were entertaining were false. Alas, who was I kidding?  The way we were sending messages to each other even changed, we were sounding like a couple.  The way he held my hand when we walked down the street, the way he kissed me goodbye when we had spent a day together left me breathless…  Trust me i have friends, I do not entertain anything further than a hug from my friends but this man, this man…he got my head spinning, no kidding..(thank you John Legend)  I fell in love with everything about this fine man, i could not wait to wake up to his messages or phone calls, I even saved all our conversations and went to bed in his t-shirt.  He was on my mind all day long and just him appearing at my workplace to surprise me got me losing focus.

There is a big BUT in this story and here it comes.  BUT we had promised each other that this was not going to get serious because our lives were taking different paths.  We lied to ourselves, the words were unspoken but deep inside we both knew there was more to this.  I do not regret knowing this man, he has a good heart, and a fine body you just want him to hold you close in his strong arms.  I also do not regret not ever telling him I love him, in case I was seen as the weaker party between the two of us, or the feeling was probably not mutual, or he probably would say he felt the same way because I had told him and did not want me to feel bad about it, or simply because a man finds a woman and not the other way round?? There are so many reasons why I will never tell him about it. But I do love him, truly, madly and deeply.   At some point in my life I actually believed that you can only love once, but i disagree, the heart was made for loving, it just loves to love, even when it knows it will get hurt.  This time however, my heart fell and is in love with the right man, but he can never know because I will never tell him…Tough world is it not?

 

I am not the only one facing this “catching feelings” problem though.  I have a few friends around me in the same predicament.  I will not mention her name, for fear that she might mention my fine mans name, but she will know I am talking about her once she reads this.  She is dangerously in love with a guy who stays a few streets away from her place.  They have been together for a while now but the “L” word has not been spoken.  Though she has gone through sleepless nights, endless composing and deleting of messages directed to him without actually sending them to him we both know she is completely love stoned and has caught feelings left, right and centre! So what is supposed to happen to us women and our feelings if these men do no communicate their feelings or if they do not see the signs we send off to them??? Tofira mukati here because I for one am not going to be telling a man that I have fallen in love with him!  We go through such hard times trying to hide our emotions fearing that how we feel will be taken for granted because we have loved and lost one too many times.

Anyways, in case you are wondering if you have caught feelings here are a few pointers:

  • You can not get the person out of your mind.
  • You get excited when you receive a message or phone call from them.
  • You get affected if they do not get in touch with you.
  • You check when they were last online and freak out wondering why they did not talk to you.
  • You can not stop talking about them.

If you experience any of those then you my dear  have officially CAUGHT FEELINGS known a long time ago as falling in love.

MaKupsy