Show me a woman who doesn’t want a man with a plan and I will show you a liar! – MaKupsy 2017
The following deal breakers apply to both male and female so pay attention this might be the reason why one or some of your relationships have not worked out.
I don’t know about you but personally if the person who is supposedly pursuing me is not friends with taking a bath that might be an actual reason to go our separate ways. I think that we should all love ourselves enough to take care of our bodies and that includes basic things like taking a bath, brushing your teeth, cutting your nails, flushing after yourself when you leave the toilet and wearing clean ironed clothes!! It might sound basic on paper but some people couldn’t care less and go around looking like they just walked out of a maize field and expect to get a partner looking like that?
Inability To Spend
Now before you raise your eyebrows I am not talking about a man spending money on a woman. I am talking about an individual spending money on THEMSELVES. This right here is an actual cause of concern because if you are not occasionally spoiling yourself with the finer things what are the chances of you doing the same for a partner if you end up with one? However, this can work either way because one may not necessarily spend on themselves but will spend on their partner…BUT it’s very rare that this happens; it’s complicated really.
Drive & Ambition
Show me a woman(man) who doesn’t want a man with a plan and I will show you a liar! As you get older relationships become less of “Let’s see how this goes” and more of “What’s the plan between us”. By plan I don’t mean a couple getting marriage which is a great idea by the way. In this case I mean a plan to work together and encourage each other to reach personal and couple goals. A plan for what your day, weekend, month or year together will look like. Nothing brings a yawn fest as much as having a partner who has no plan whatsoever for the team. Remember a relationship is a team effort and if you are the only one driving the team you will get tired and that right there will be the beginning of many problems to come. I once had a conversation with a friend who told me that in order for people to have less stress in relationships they should try and pair up with people who “mirror them”. Loosely translated to be with someone who has dreams, aspirations and the same energy as you do that way you will be team players and not have a situation of a pilot and a passenger in the relationship.
This has to be the biggest deal breaker for me. If you are in a relationship feelings change for the worst or the best and that is perfectly okay. It is always best to communicate how you feel about the next person because even though some of the honesty might hurt it saves a couple time. For example, if you fall out of love with someone don’t keep quiet about it and hope things will change. Sometimes all you need to do is talk about it with your partner and find ways to bring back the fire. If that fails then do the adult thing and break up amicably. Most people choose to keep quiet about how they feel and end up cheating and hurting more people than necessary in the process. If you are about this relationship business then you have to start getting your communication skills in tip top shape.
We were all brought up differently and when you get into a relationship this is the first thing you need to remind yourself. What might be perfectly normal to you might be foreign to the next person. You have to be patient and get to learn what you are both about but it doesn’t mean you have to stay on if you are unhappy. Your happiness comes first and after you have tried everything to try and blend in it’s fine to walk away and take care of yourself.
These are the four main deal breakers for me. What are yours?
I know I didn’t add cheating but it’s so cliche everyone says they won’t tolerate cheating but most people end up putting up with it when they find out but that’s a story for a completely different day.
Today, let’s talk about what will stop you from dating that one person you have your eye on?